Suarez, Sturridge, Robben. Do AFC need a Cheat?

March 18, 2014

Bear with me ….

Over the past week we have seen and been on the wrong end of some dreadful cheats. A quick think brings me to Sturridge’s appalling dive to get Vidic sent off, Robben’s dive to earn BM a penalty, Suarez theatrics (nothing new there) and the world renowned Gerrard Flop.

Furtherrmore, this season we have had Lewandowski at Dortmund flapping around like a beached trout and Ashley Young perfecting his double somersault with twist and pike.

Over at Stamford Bridge we have some wonderful diving talent – Hazard, Oscar and Torres trying successfully to do The Drogba (a master of the art). Man City rely on the collapsing talents of Silva, Dzeko and Nasri.

Spurs have lost Monkeyboy who is world class at cheating but he has joined a whole team well versed in the Dark Arts – Marcelo, Ronaldo and Pepe etc – all love a dive.

Barca have Busquets, Pique, the obnoxious Alves, Neymar and Adriano.

So, who are Arsenal’s divers and if we don’t have them  …. why not?

Diving pays. It may offend your finer sensibility but it works – time and time again. What is the cost if a dive gets spotted by the referee? A yellow card, hardly enough of a deterrent to stop a clever forward, after all the profit is a penalty and probably a goal. Yellow card or goal? Ask a defender whether they would take one for the team when an attacker is advancing on goal – we fans get angry when the defender prefers to allow the game to flow!! So why not use such a cost-free tactic?

The antics of Robben last week infuriated me but had Giroud the nous to cheat his way to a penalty in a similar manner would I really protest? Would you?

What the first few para’s show is that all the top sides have players who dive and do so on a regular basis. A dive can get your team not just a penalty but also in the case of Sturridge a valuable defender sent off.

I am trying to recall an Arsenal player diving for a penalty. It must have happened in the last few seasons but I cannot recall it. Eduardo was called for diving – and goodness me the media went mad – even though he was just avoiding an Orc trashing his damaged leg. Perhaps this has had a knock-on effect on the way we play. Eboue liked a dive but he was so hopeless at “simulation” it became laughable and embarrassing.  Oh, I just remembered Santi diving vs West Brom in 2012 and Arteta burying the pen.Since then ….. ?

I know, I know … it isn’t The Arsenal Way, we always take the moral high ground and I am proud of Wenger’s honesty and his belief in The Beautiful Game but just once couldn’t we ape our opposition and go for the reverse dive with tuck?

What do you think?

written Tongue-in-Cheek by Big Raddy


Kagawa bout it!?

January 12, 2012

With the departure of Cesc and Nasri, no matter what you think of the players, it’s obvious that our goals from the midfield area have reduced. Whether this be down to the injury of Wilshire, or the lack of width provided by the full backs, I don’t know. But, with Arshavin looking increasingly on his way out, what has become clear is that Arsenal are in need of an attacking midfielder/wide player who can create and score goals in equal measure. So let’s have a look at the players capable of filling that Cesc shaped hole:

Xherdan Shaqiri
Age 20
FC Basle
Games 14(0)
Goals(assists) 4(1)
Value £15m-£25m

Was one of the main reasons why Man U are going to be playing Europa League football this year (couldn’t resist!). Small, strong and quick, this youngster has the build that modern defenders just hate to see on the opposite side. Capable of the sublime, as he showed against England recently, this lad has the potential to become one of the worlds best. More of a winger than attacking midfielder and some may feel not quite at the level that Arsenal need just yet, but if potential is what you are looking for then this is the man. Now a regular in the Swiss team, may be looking to move his career on to the next level. Should be available if the right money is offered.

Mario Goetze
Age 19
Borussia Dortmund
Games 22(4)
Goals 7(8)
Value £30m+

What can you say about this boy (still only 19!) that hasnt been said already? Have a Motm performance against us in the first CL game this year and is the closest thing you will find to Cesc in world football at the moment. An extremely talented individual who is as sharp as a button and has an eye for a pass. His stats also suggest his finishing ain’t bad either. What I really like about this kid, from what I’ve seen and heard, is his ability to perform in the big games.  Was magnificent against us and scored the winner against Munich in a recent crunch league game. Downside? At £30m+ and with the big boys circling, a bidding war is not what Arsenal want. If you believe everything you read in the papers then apparently we could have had him last season, but we don’t. If Wenger is serious about signing him then he needs to act fast and pull out the cheque book. Personally, I think this ship has sailed. I would give my right arm to be proved wrong though!

Eden Hazard
Age 21
Games 28(4)
Goals 8(8)
Value £15m-£25m

The young Belgian has had tongues wagging at Arsenal for a while now but no concrete bids seem to have been made as yet. Has been in good form again this season and a move to a bigger stage seems more and more likely as transfer stories seem to pop up every window. A wide player who can beat people, the lad has enormous talent and potential. Interesting then than Wenger opted to sign his teammate Gervinho rather than the lad himself last season. Some say that he’s overrated, and at £20m Wenger may have done the right thing in avoiding him, but at 21, the kid seems to have the world at his feet, and who better to take him to the next level than Arsene Wenger.

Thinking outside the box!

Shinji Kagawa
Age 22
Borussia Dortmund
Games 27(3)
Goals 10(5)
Value £15m-£25m

With so much talk about his teammate Goetze, this young Japanese star seems to have flown under the radar a little. With 17 goals to his name last term and with 10 already this year, the lightweight winger has shown he has an eye for goal. He may not be as supremely talented as his German teammate, but he is still one of Europes top prospects, and whilst the like of Barca, Real and Man City battle it out for Goetze, Arsene may be able to pull off a master strike and sneak this kid out of the back door of the
Signal Iduna Park.

I’m sure you all have ideas of your own, and no doubt most of you will be praying we see Goetze in an Arsenal shirt next year ( I know I will!). But if it does become a bidding war, then I think Kagawa could be just what we are looking for.


Three Down, One or Two to go?

August 31, 2011

Just a short second post today as all eyes will be on the TD, with supporters frantically F5ing every source of news they can find.

Who knows how much of a spur the 8:2 ‘humiliation’ was to the powers that be at Arsenal, but  one thing is for sure, the 3 signings that have followed in quick succession have at last shown that we are serious about producing a team that can compete with the best this season.

After having highlighted the defence as our weakness yet again this summer, Arsène has finally done something about it. Mertesacker and Santos tick the quality, experience and size boxes. They’re both seasoned internationals and are proven winners.

At 26, Park Chu Young must also be entering his peak years although it is thought that we will only have him for 2 before he returns home for national service. He is the captain of South Korea and also brings experience as well as goals to the side.

So is that it? Are we done?

Well I hope not. We know that Cesc was irreplaceable, but from the ashes of the team that was built around him can rise a new more direct Arsenal that would owe more to the Invincibles than the team of recent years. Santos is a very attacking fullback whose record is 1 goal in 5 for Fenerbache – A’Cole’s record is 1 goal in 30.

Gervinho and Park are also very quick and have an eye for goal so all of a sudden we have the potential to score from all angles. All we need now is the midfielder to unlock defences with that killer (dare I say Cesc-like) pass.

Will Jack be promoted further up the pitch to fill that role? He certainly has the vision and passing ability, but his young frame was overplayed last season and he is paying the price now. Ramsey already looks exhausted and in need of support.

I would be happy with one more signing in midfield, but time is running out and candidates of real top quality are few and far between although there are seemingly plenty of names in the mix – add Fellaini and Dempsey to those already identified. The news that we have been linked to Honda this morning adds his name to a list that still includes Hazard (the preferred choice of many) and M’Vila who would certainly add strength but is more defensive in his play.

I’m greedy, I’d like the power of M’Vila and the craft of Hazard, but I don’t expect that will happen. Hazard is going nowhere I suspect. Honda will bridge the gap between the two in some way so maybe he will be the answer.

We’ve probably done enough to ensure we will be in a strong position for the rest of the season, but wouldn’t it be nice if we just made that last flagship signing that really showed our intent.

One thing is for sure, we are now in a far better position than our North London rivals and we will have some great new signings to light up the Emirates pitch and hopefully get the fans singing this season.

Well done Arsène, 3 rabbits out of the hat – just one more would be nice.

Hastily written by Rasp