Is it just me, or are player nicknames not as imaginative these days?

Or as intimidating?

In the past, fearsome defenders had fearsome monikers to put the wind up opponents before the whistle had even blown.

I’m thinking of Norman “Bites Yer Legs” Hunter, Stuart “Psycho” Pearce, Ron “Chopper” Harris, Julian “The Terminator” Dicks. Charlton Athletic’s Derek Hales had not one but two scary soubriquets: “Killer” and “Deadly Derek.” The big centre half Barry Kitchener at Millwall was known as “Lurch.” In these more refined times you have to go to World Wrestling Entertainment to find nicknames like that.

And if they’re too red-in-tooth-and-claw for our modern sensibilities, how about humorous nicknames? Again, I would contend they’re just not as funny as they used to be.

Who could resist a smile on hearing that Ray Parlour was “the Romford Pele” or that the former Palace and Watford player Fitz Hall was known as “One Size” (one size fits all – geddit?).

In more recent times Per Mertesacker’s nickname takes some beating: calling him The BFG (channeling Roald Dahl’s Big Friendly Giant but adding a healthy dose of irreverence to turn it into Big F_____g German) was a stroke of genius and caught on with the fans from day one, even if it took a while for Per to understand the joke (who’d have thought Germans would struggle with a sense of humour?).

So let’s look at our current first team players.

Aubameyang is Auba, Lacazette is Laca, Ozil is just, well, Ozil… I mean, come on! Surely we can do better?

I suppose Torreira/Terrier is just about acceptable (it works as a pun and sort-of describes his playing style). Doozy for Guendouzi might have some mileage (dictionary definition of ‘doozy’ – “something outstanding or unique of its kind”) but has it really caught on? Kolasinac is sometimes called “Tank”, which is fair enough (although often his defending makes him more ‘septic’ than ‘Chieftain’).

So let’s have a stab at coming up with some new nicknames for our boys. I’ll get the ball rolling, but please pitch in with your own suggestions:

Hector “The Protector” Bellerin (protects our goal from enemy wingers).

Pierre Emerick “BamBam” Aubameyang.

Rob “Small” Holding (it’s meant to be ironic, given that he’s 6ft 2in).

Reiss “Horatio” Nelson (heroic enough, but then does anyone know their history these days?).

Skodhran “Skoda” Mustafi (occasionally dependable but a bit slow and prone to breaking down).

Calum “Star” Chambers (another one for the history buffs).

Mesut “Kaa” Ozil (Kaa is the hypnotic snake from The Jungle Book: Ozil, at his best, seems to hypnotise defenders… plus there’s those big, bulging eyes).

Dani “Sasquatch” Ceballos (have you seen the size of his big feet?).

Alexandre “The Lion of Lyon” Lacazette (bit rubbish, but all I could manage. He was born in Lyon).

Gabriel “The Angel” Martinelli (simple, but I like it).

I feel a bit sorry for Joe Willock (who is a terrific prospect) because all I could think of for him was Joe “The Pillock” Willock, which is most unfair. So I won’t mention that one.

Come on you lot, help me out.

Or at least mention your favourite nicknames for players past and present (of Arsenal or any other club).

I’ll leave you with a funny anecdote. When Shola Ameobi was playing for Newcastle United under the managership of the aging and somewhat forgetful Bobby Robson, an interviewer asked him what the other players called him. The disappointing answer was “Shola.” Then the interviewer said: “What does Bobby Robson call you?” Ameobi replied: “He calls me Carl Cort.”

RockyLives

We sit third but without being that convincing to date. One does worry that we have slightly got away with it till now and the performances will not sustain us in our search for a points tally that sees us have a more successful season.

We have some unenviable stats where we top a league across many leagues for shots on our goal. How is this happening? I am not sure of the exact figures and maybe one of you lovely people can shed some statistical light on it.

I have also wondered whether there are any stats out there as to how often a teams defence have to face a defensive moment. My gut feeling is that this could also be very telling if say, for instance, our defence was having to face 50% more “defensive moments” than any near rival.

The sheer numbers game would indicate that you will eventually concede more than those rivals no matter how good your dfenders are individually and as a group.

I was interested in reading that Emery was after Boly to quote “solve Arsenal’s defensive woes”. My question is this. Is it just about the quality of defender we have or don’t have right now that is our big issue, and throwing another defender into the mix will solve our defensive problems, or is it more of a whole team structure thing that sees our defence called into action far more often than it should be and our rivals, and thus explain that worrying shots on goal stat?

Please discuss ……….

GoonerB

Yes, the headline is deliberately flippant.

But look at the facts:

• Third in the league, only a point behind last year’s all-conquering champions.
• Four points ahead of Teeteringham.
• Six points ahead of Manchester United.
• Only one defeat in eight games in the Premier League.
• In the last two and half weeks we have played 6 games in all competitions, Won 5, Drawn 1, Lost 0; Goals for 17, Goals against 3.

On paper we’re in the title race, albeit a long way behind the long-haired lovers from Liverpool.

Yet it doesn’t feel like we’re anywhere close to being able to contemplate a serious tilt at the title and performances like yesterday’s against Bournemouth don’t help.

We can take satisfaction from getting our 1-0 win and three very valuable points, but life still is not a bowl of cherries. I’ll come on to possible reasons why later, but first a quick recap of the match.

Unai Emery’s team selection was fairly predictable. RC in his pre-match write up got 10 out of 11, missing only Ceballos, who was preferred to RC’s prediction of Torreira.

At the start of the day Bournemouth were only a point behind us in the league and we all know they can play a bit, so this was never likely to be a pushover.

That said, we started well with Saka looking particularly lively on the left flank, Ceballos pulling the strings in midfield, Guendouzi surging round the pitch like a remote controlled car on Christmas morning and even Pepe showing some silky skills.

The breakthrough came early, and not from any of the attackers. A corner from our right was adroitly pinged into the box by Pepe and found the curly coiffured bonce of our bouncy Brazilian centre back. He had a lot to do to direct the ball on target, but in it went. A first Arsenal goal for David Luiz and an assist for Pepe.

For the rest of the first half we were effortlessly in control, stroking the ball about easily and looking dangerous in attack, while Bournemouth offered little threat. We created multiple good situations but the final touch or pass was always slightly off and we were not able to build on our lead. As the minutes ticked into the 40s and it was still only 1-0 despite our dominance, I began to feel some familiar nerves twitching into life.

Sure enough Bournemouth came out a much more committed side after the break, presumably after a rocket from Eddie Howe. They harried us more effectively and slowly but surely became the dominant side.

As the second half wore on and our attacking thrust got blunter and blunter, an equaliser started to feel inevitable.

Some of the most perilous moments came directly from rare occasions when we were carving through Bournemouth and looking to threaten their goal, only for a piece of carelessness from one of our players to set them on the counter attack.

In the space of one period of just a couple of minutes Kolasinac, under no pressure whatsoever, passed the ball to a Bournemouth player who launched a break which almost resulted in a goal; then Guendouzi lost the ball carelessly and again, a few seconds later, we were lucky not to concede (although to Gwen’s credit it was he who made the gut-busting run and desperate tackle that saved a goal).

And that summed up our second half: sloppy. I don’t know if the conditions were difficult (the sun was shining, but had there been heavy rain earlier?), but every time we tried to do something positive it was spoiled by a wayward pass, a piece of bad control, getting carelessly caught in possession or even just tripping over our own feet.

When the whistle blew after five minutes of added time it was a huge relief.

So we had a win, but not one to send the faithful home feeling like the team is finding its rhythm and ready to push on with a serious top four challenge.

I thought our shape and system looked OK yesterday (certainly compared with some games, such as Watford or Man Utd), but – in the second half at least – there was a lack of concentration throughout the team, particularly in the attacking half.

Hopefully it was just a difficult day at the office and the sort of sustained focus we have seen in the cup games can quickly be integrated back into our league effort.

We happen to be on one of those runs (in the league) where the results are OK but the performances are worrying. From that position things can go in two directions: either the performances don’t improve and we don’t keep ‘getting away with it’ or things start to gel on the pitch and the results stay good. Take your pick.

I’ll end with some positives, beyond just getting the three points: for a start, the important thing is that we did not let Bournemouth get their goal and that was down to some committed defending, particularly from Chambers, but with Luiz and Sokratis also having some big defensive moments, while Leno was reliable as ever with his shot stopping.

Hopefully the clean sheet is indicative of a sharper defensive focus. The danger moments came from mistakes at the attacking end of the field leading to Bournemouth counters: they did not come from our defenders putting on clown shoes and red noses in our own defensive third as they have done too many times this season already.

Now we go into the international break on the back of a good run of results and with a struggling Sheffield United team waiting for us when league action resumes.

We are third in the league I said we are third in the league… (Doesn’t have quite the right ring to it, does it?).

Player Ratings

Leno    7

Didn’t have too many saves to make but was in the right place when called on. One interception of a dangerous low cross sticks in the memory as an instance of his excellent anticipation.

Chambers       8 (MoTM)

Chambers is on a very good run of form. Made some top tackles and interceptions in our box and helped link play well when going forward. Best of all, he always seems composed on the ball.

Sokratis           7

Didn’t do much wrong and made a couple of important tackles and headers.

Luiz      7.5

As per Sokratis, but with an extra half point for the goal.

Xhaka              5.5

I’m not as down on Xhaka as some, but much of this game passed him by (although he still had time to make some stupid tackles).

Ceballos          6.5

Good in the first half, faded in the second before being substituted.

Guendouzi       7

Typically energetic performance, but his play was littered with concentration lapses in the second half.

Pepe    6

You can almost smell the crowd willing him to turn it on. He showed some great dribbling skills at times, though usually with little end product. Not a bad a outing but this was not the game where he suddenly turns the corner. Nice cross for the goal.

Aubameyang  6.5

Struggled to make an impact, but it wasn’t really his fault. Most of our moves broke down before the ball reached him in dangerous positions.

Saka    7

Very bright in the first half but was another who faded after half time.

Subs

Martinelli        7

Looked lively and clearly uses the same batteries as Guendouzi.

Willock            6.5

Another encouraging outing for Willock, but by the time he came on our second half malaise was already too deeply embedded.

Torriera           6.5

A tidy 10 minutes or so from the Uruguayan.

RockyLives

Another home game but this time in the EPL. A match against a team that is only one point behind us…A win against will create a gap between us and them (and also Tottenham 🙂 ) of 4 points and it will also see us on the podium…So there is a lot to play for today in front of our crowd.

Bournemouth are no pushover. They play decent football and they have some good footballers like Calum Wilson, Diego Rico, Harry Wilson, Joshua King, Nathan Ake, Ryan Fraser and to a certain extent also Ibe and Solanke. Their form has been on and off with good wins and also big losses, mostly because of their inconsistant and weaker defensive efforts. Will they park the bus against us? Not sure. They tend to play a 442 and I expect them to play a 442 tomorrow but maybe Solanke will play a bit deeper…

So how to beat them? They like to counter-attack and they like set-pieces. They are fast on attacking transitions but struggle sometimes defensively so if I were Emery, I d make sure to put pressure on their defense and I d also block the wings…Again, the predicted line-up and my preferred line-up:

Emery’s line up:

Leno

Chambers   Sokratis   Luiz   Kolasinac

Guendouzi   Xhaka   Torreira

Pepe   Aubameyang   Saka

My line up:

Leno

Chambers   Sokratis   Luiz   

AMN Guendouzi   Torreira   Willock   Kola

Pepe   Aubameyang

I think my line up will just annoy the hell out of Bournemouth while maximizing Auba and Pepe’s offensive threat and Willock and Douzi’s attacking runs.

Anyways, this game is a MUST win especially at home. We need to capitalize on Tottenham’s poor form, Leicester loss and last season, we didn’t and this is how we missed out on Top 4. If we are to compete for the Top 4, we have to win at home especially when our rivals lose.

Let us do this and COYG! My predicted score: 3-2 with Auba, Pepe on the scoresheet together with Luiz. We will concede a goal to Solanke and Wilson (Calum).

RC78