Before anyone says how a little terrier-like defensive midfielder could “do a job” for us, let me tell you a story which highlights perfectly that height matters.
As a child, my elder brother and I would be sent to the Highlands of Scotland to spend two miserable weeks of our Summer Holidays with Uncle Earnest.
Earnest now has a vicious Highland Terrier called Duncan. However, Duncan’s Grandfather on his paternal side was called Dougal, and this was the beast we encountered.
My Uncle thought it would be fun for him to watch (while being character building for us) “Hunt the Children”. We were given a twenty minute head start, before the vicious little bastard was released. We knew this game was on the cards and were prepared. Being clever ten and twelve year olds, we made our way swiftly across a short open patch of moorland to a small copse, where we had prepared our hide. A cunning platform located three feet in the air among the branches of a rowan tree, with a pre-assembled armoury of chosen rocks. Dougal arrived. We hurled down said missiles from our lofty station, and killed the bastard stone dead.
Good you may well say. Mmm, ok, but not soon enough, as the bastard had already fathered a Son, Angus. We never did kill Angus, who in turn, went on to father the ghastly Duncan.
Still, a lesson to be learnt. Had Dougal been taller, he could have leapt like a salmon and eaten us. See, height matters.
Now, our new Defensive Midfielder at Arsenal. Six foot one inch is the minimum.
During this season, I remember reading on here how someone, in praising the undoubted work rate of Ollie G, also stated what a great headed clearance he had made from some opposition corner or other. My first thought was “I don’t want my Centre Forward anywhere near our own goalmouth”. I want him poised near the half way line ready for some blistering counter attack.
Now first up, Ollie is not the world’s finest header of the ball anyway, but surely a deaper lying Big ‘Un would serve us well. This way there would be no need for our French stud to have to be in that position, as he not covering for our height challenged midfielders?
This kind of brings me on to ask myself the question:
“Can there ever be a case where a Big ‘Un is not preferable to a Little ‘Un, and I mean in any position.”
Sure, there are the twinkle toed genius’ like Messi and Maradona, but a side has more power and versatility with the likes of a Zidane or a Ronaldo (Lady Boy version), as well as all the magic dust.
Thank goodness my Uncle Earnest was no tactical genius like me, otherwise he would have opted for a larger breed of hound, and think how much more fun would his Summers have been in watching the odd Nephew getting eaten. How he would have enjoyed that.
Written by MickyDidIt
jeeeezzzz. And I thought I had bad uncles. You poor man.
Drogba used to drop back and defend for chelsea and they were never particularly “height challenged”. The last time we were serious challengers for the title we had a centre midfield composed of Fabregas and Flamini and more importantly a perfectly balanced side that was easily the best in the league until Eduardo suffered a fairly unusual and unfortunate injury which left us with only one striker of note and a few psychological scars which is really what ended our title run (as well as more than a few very unfortunate refereeing decisions). Anyway, it was nothing to do with a lack of height – even our centre backs were shorter that year! Having players with energy is what matters. Flamini played like 2 men that season and Ramsey has played that way this year, with some added attacking genius on top! We do need a solid and reliable DM who can withstand a physical challenge imo but I don’t think it matters massively how tall he is.
I am led to understand that a Big ‘un is no better than a Little ‘un. It is they way they are used that matters 😀
Poor Dougal murdered by savages.
The Ghost of Dougal is Stirring
I know chas put this up earlier but it is worth watching on repeat….
http://player.arsenal.com/player/5130-fa-cup-mini-movie
David Luiz set to become the most expensive defender in history? The man isn’t even the best defender at Chelsea.
Madness.
BIG RADDY @ 1032
🙂
David reminds me of the clown in the Simpsons cartoon.
Side show bob? I think. psg really got taken at 40mil. He is not worth more than 15-20 mil imo.
Cheeky little post there Micky. As usual I can see there is a serious point despite the tales of your derring do in the highlands 🙂
I agree that mobile, hard working, and having a great engine are all very important attributes. We have suffered in the past when we’ve lacked height playing against the likes of Stoke by giving away stupid free kicks that can be delivered into the melee in the box (ooo errr missus 🙂 )
I remember Joey Barton delivering one such cross onto Andy Caroll’s head to beat us 1 nil at the Emirates.
Hopefully the new look Arsenal defence with Merts would not be so vulnerable, but once again it was a needless free kick to give away when one of our smaller midfielders just ran into the back of their player and held his hands up as if to say ‘it wasn’t me guv, honest ‘
I’m more than happy to have some tall guys in the team, but power and pace come top of my list after the obvious skill sets needed by an Arsenal player.
Nice one, Micky,
It is said that a good big ‘un will always beat a good little ‘un, and I have to agree, altho I am possibly a little biased.
Now I think that adage referred to boxing and not football, so it needs modification in the sense that football is a team game, unlike boxing, and with many positions requiring different attributes.
Rasp has said that power and pace are the first priority and I agree, whatever the position, but that is not exclusive, in the sense that a tall well built player with pace and power will usually be expected to beat a smaller guy with similar physical characteristics.
Take Paddy Vieira a tall, well built guy with great skill who would not want him in midfield. An injury free Diaby would also meet that criteria.
I think what Micky was getting at was that where teams we meet have tall, well built players, who are not particularly skilful but effective in the air, we can be at a disadvantage against them with our shorter, smaller players, however skilful.
And I agree.
Micky dit it. Again. well done, Micky. 🙂 🙂 a clever little un, and will surely liven up a grey muggy day. Fantastic. 🙂
On to serious business then. Strength for me is the key word here. Strength and robustness. We need a player who will hold on to teh ball in possession in midfield, not fall over. Will hassle the opposition out of possession. Will challenge for every loose ball, on the ground and yes, in the air as well, so height matters certainly. Besides strength and robustness are surely correlated with height.
At the moment, we have nifty players who do not chase loose balls pinged back to the centre circle, who do not challenge opposition midfielders in possession with the implicit threat of breaking their legs, fairly. Further, apart from Giroud, we have no one who will hold on to teh ball and keep standing on his feet.
So, the answer is really blowing in the wind. 🙂 🙂 And yes, Diaby could do the trick. You heard it here first.
But it will be good to have a back up plan. A Partick Vieira or Yaya Toure for the future. Now, where is that magic one? 😛
Regarding Diaby. Well, Redders, really, but I have also been saying this at least once every week. 😛
As a rule of thumb I think you’d be right, big men beat little men. And given the same skill set you’d typically take the big one.
And there is plenty of room for good little men.
Micky,
With today’s emphasis on 4-4 or 5-4 defenses I feel it is essential of have quick nimble players to break them down, that does not of course mean they have to be small in height. However it is most unusual to find those qualities in players with a large stature.
I simply cannot see AW rushing out to replace our shorter players for the sake of height or weight – it appears that his first criteria in selecting players for his squad is technical skill.
I’m of the mind that football is a close to the ground sport and you need athletes whose equilibrium’s match the need. They could be of a large stature but are usually smaller players.
Poor Dougal he got stoned to death for being Uncle Ernie’s trained
attack hound, no one deserves that ending – not even RVP!
Afternoon all,
Dog murderers and big and little uns, bit of a strange one today but seeing how i am not much of a dog lover i will dismiss that one, but the other has a better feel about it.
I assume that the meaning of this post, is that Arsene has a hundred mill to splash out, and Micky is trying to work out who we can get.
Nice one Micky, Santi Jack Arteta Rosisky are not the biggest and they do get swatted like fly’s all the time. Yes they all have redeeming features but lightweight all the same.
Personally i like big players, remembering when i played and watching your opponents come out of the changing rooms and seeing big tough lads coming out always made me think its going to be tough afternoon, So i am all for bigger guys.
Wengers got some wonga at last, so he can now be a bit more choosy. I hope he picks biguns with the skill required, and a turn of pace. I have had enough of shortarses jumping alongside players with absolutely no intention of ever heading a ball.
Our team over the years have struck me as good players with bundles of tricks but it has to be said Bottlers. I want that mean streak back, powerful players winning headers and challenges. and with a turn of speed to turn defence into attack.
A Hundred mill should buy at least 5 players, and we need them all, Not bothered with them being Marquee signings just competent big and pacey, the right players for the positions vacant
nice one, Steve. 🙂
“A Hundred mill should buy at least 5 players, and we need them all, Not bothered with them being Marquee signings just competent big and pacey, the right players for the positions vacant”
Haha – brilliant Micky
You know what they say: it’s not the size of the dog in the fight… It’s the size of the rock that lands on the dog’s head.
Aha, I almost forgot about Uncle Earnest and his dog! Unbelievable story – the old boy must have been waiting for the arrival of DidIts and the ungrateful little bastards killed his dog! Shocking
Size in every position ( in footballing terms) matters. A big goalie, strong stocky defenders, small versatile and fast spanish type midfielders and tall but slim strikers for me. My sister in Switzerland only fancies short fat blocks, but then she ends up wearing comfortable shoes. That’s why I would always choose a big guy for the job
Evonne: And big fans (thinking GiE et al) who can keep the bile-spewing gits at the Ems in check. 🙂 🙂 🙂
arnie 🙂 GiE is big all right, but a softie, I wouldn’t choose him for my team
Evonne 🙂
I’m all for giving KIM KALSTROM one more year . I liked what I saw from him this year and we have FRANCIS COQULIN also coming back from loan. He is also a fighting terrier type and I don’t think he will disappoint. What we need is back up pacey right forward winger as backup for THEO. Backup for CARL IF SAGNA the warrior leaves. Keep VIV as second goalkeeper and depending on what happens with our efforts in keeping TV , giving MIGUEL the chance he craves by bringing him along in the first team as our backup CB. CAMPBELL might come in handy in our campaign this year. Bringing more than two new faces in might have the same destabilizing effect on the first team that it did our neighbors the spudniks. I don’t think the term bottlers should ever be used in describing the ARSENAL in any of its incarnations these past five or six years. If anything I think they have been the ultimate warriors trying their best to compete with abnormally doped up clubs such as shitty and chelski and manure. And to some extent the new big spenders pool and totteringham.
It is possible to beat these teams on the pitch to the finish line sometimes but you need extraordinary managers like AW and SIMONE to guide the team through at critical turns. Might not happen every year but sweet when it does. Financially we are light years away in competing with some clubs nor should we ever. It just isn’t the ARSENAL nor AWs way. League and European FFP might even out the playing field somewhat but that remains to be seen.
OMG, Bobby Zamora has done it again
Joey f•••••• Barton
Another good reason qpr should not be allowed back in the EPL. come on RAMS…..
hmmm. not a happy bunny. 😦
not a happy bear. Poor poor Derby
oh well. Kay sera sera. There is always next year for DERBY.
You have to give credit to Arry, Down to 10 men with 30 minutes left in the game and he sets his team up perfectly, hoping for a big mistake by Derby and of all people to give the ball away to – its Bobby Zamora, he makes no mistake and its 1-0 in the 90th minute.
Yet another football game ending with a “Hollywood” finish.
The problem is that QPR will be playing the same old hacking at legs mercenary game that is more rugby than footy. They have done the same all game today. This is a threat for Arsenal. 😦
Plus, there are financial issues which the league has to sort out. But that is their problem.
OK, give it to Harry, but at least they can try and play football. What a shocker of a foul to deny a goal as well. No wonder the English game is subject to ridicule elsewhere. 😦
Is this the face of EPL to the outside world? http://news.bbcimg.co.uk/media/images/75083000/jpg/_75083182_johnnyrussellfouled_240514_getty.jpg
I hang my head in shame! 😦
I never watched the game just reviewed the text every so often.
But when Arry has the players he tries to play football and I was very happy when Levy fired him and put N17 back where it belongs.
Ahoy All.
Evonne,
Come off it. Us, “ungrateful little bastards”!!! Dougal was horrible, and even when we broke the news to Uncle Earnest, even he said he didn’t mind as he never liked the beast either.
Now. £40M for David Luiz!!! Cripes, that’s bonkers even in this mad world.
Not happy that another kick and run team is in the PL when a fine footballing side like Derby have to play another season in the Championship.
But one of my least favourite managers is back in the PL and I will have another opportunity to ridicule him. Horrible man and a proven liar.
Ok Micky, that was a bit harsh, sorry. I like dogs more than I like people, but if the owner wasn’t upset, then Dougal must have been bad
Nothing wrong with Dougal. He wanted to protect his master from incursion by Southern interlopers.
Didn’t work for William Wallace who also perished at the hands of the English oppressors.
History is always written by the victors 😦
Ah Evonne
I too like dogs more than people, and I don’t particularly like dogs 🙂
Zero faith in humanity.
Ah but Raddy, QPR like giving us lots of “three points”, and also, 26’s Son likes them.
Quite looking forward to game tonight.
I will miss the game, unless it goes to extra time. Only TalhShite for me until then. 😦
Look here, you old hippy, are you now calling me a southern oppressor? 🙂
What, just popping out for a change Arnie? 🙂
Micky. Have to pick some people up from Edinburgh station and drive them home to Dundee. Taxi service. 😦
No blame can be placed at the dogs door. He was just doing what he was tasked to do. Their only purpose in life is to give unconditional love and obedience. Its the uncle who should have been , you know, culled.
Sorry MICKEY.
who was that psychologist that said ” give me fifty baby’s and in twenty years time I’ll give you ten doctors, ten engineers, ten thieves, ten builders and ten sociopaths.” its mainly in the upbringing or lack thereof. . The dog is the most regal of all animals second only to the horse.
No apologies necessary Goonerkam. Completely agree about the cull.
After that, we need to fall out. Cats are tops, and as for humans, it’s all in the genes (apart from manners shit 🙂 )
Real v Athletico.
Are there any vaguely possible transfer targets playing in either team to keep an eye on?
And my final comment. Psychologists are like teachers. 95% are a complete waste of space and should get out more. They would have a nasty shock 🙂
Micky. Look at the right backs?
Costa is already a Chav, Villa is too old, but what about Benzema?
MICKEY
Love cats too. Every animal has its own certain charm. Their only purpose in life to make us happy. I disagree with your last statement as I place more importance on environmental factors than genes in this picture. 80/20 imo.
Feel bad for DERBY. would have been nice for a proper football team to have gotten prompted. One defensive error is all she wrote.
We want the champions league wenger,
yes Micky, keep an eye on Real players, I will mind atletico
as for the arrogant, patronizing psychologists – they are mostly sex maniacs. One kept using for any situation an example of this woman fucking (his words) her colleague in a lift, another suggested that I get involved with a new man, whereas the lesbian kept starring at my private parts.
Evonne: eh? 😛
yes arnie, I am quite insane and have to see shrinks, who in turn insist that I see psychologists for therapy. Both are definitely madder than me and at least I take the prescribed meds, they are on illegal substances, I am sure of it
Don’t think much of the CL final so far… We could take either of this lot.
1-0 Atletico
Just read yesterdays post as I was busy before. It was great to meet GN5, as I mentioned last week. .I was really impressed so many locals came up to shake his hand!
Class act and lets hope The other two locals can join us next year!!
Best team is winning. Superb organisation which reminds me of our victory over Parma n the Cup Winners Final in ’94
what? are you serious Raddy? They are fouling, making up for lack of skills with disrupting the game, I don’t like them at all
We have been heavily linked with Juanfran, the Atletico right back.
Oh dear. He is just 2 years younger than Sagna and not half as good.
It’s good we have a goal. Don’t want Benzema anymore 🙂
So, just Cavani then 🙂
HB. Apart from Monkeyboys chance RM have done nothing but roll on the ground trying to get AM players booked.
AM are a proper team playing hard and with a plan. I I much prefer them to the RM fancy dans
I’d swap Di Maria for Ryo Miyaichi like a shot.
hahaha, brilliant story Micky
Bit disapointed you had to resort to murder Micky . Could you and your brother have not talked it out with the Dog? Ive always found that when accosted by a pooch, if you explain that your behaviour is a result of stunted emotional development which has led to difficultys accepting love due to feelings of unworthiness, the Hound tends to be very understanding.
Your 12 year old brother should really have got five years for that. You, been only 10, a three year stretch in borstal would suffice. Just make sure you make friends with the Daddy and avoid pulling your pants down in the green house.
I am a firm believer in leniency.
In the short term I do worry about the lack of height and pyhsical power of our side. We dont seem to have enough players to do the ugly side of the game
However, its Arsenes way, and I trust that his long term aim of winning the big prizes playing beautiful will prevail.
The Ghosts of the Thirties are Stirring
Blimey, I thought Athletico were going to park a bus 2nd half
Transplant
Tried, but Dougal had an almost incomprehensible West Coast Highland tongue.
Is Bale playing?
Terriers are right nasty little beggars Micky. The Chavs of the dog world. The only time I’ve ever been bitten by a mutt – it was a Jack Russell with a vicious temper.
It was owned by the loveliest bloke you could ever care to meet. I sometimes wonder if the dog was like a witch’s familiar and contained all the nasty bites that were missing from the owner.
*bits
Nope – I think ‘bites’ does it, RL.
I believe Jack Russells are from Yorkshire, so what’s the best you were hoping for. Not modesty, I imagine.
hahaha, Beyond the M25 I cant understand any ones accent Micky, but just because they offend my cockney sensibilities I dont go round murdering them. Though, I admit, in the past ive considered it.
Also, been an enemy of dog excrement on my shoe, if I was the judge I would have given you a medal.
My late father-in-law also owned a JR that was so mean it had to be locked away whenever anyone was visiting.
We encountered each other just the once, when it got loose one Christmas. I was three sheets to the wind and, given that I had ‘previous’ with Jack Russels I was ready. We eyed each other up for a few seconds, then he went on his way.
I had been fully prepared to boot his scrawny little arse up to join the angel at the top of the Christmas tree.
I think he sensed my intentions. Well, that or the brandy breath drive him away.
Gabi is a fine defensive midfielder, and who cares is he’s less than six foot 🙂
I’d swap him for Ryo Miaichi like a shot.
“I had ‘previous’ with Jack” ROLF 🙂
No you wouldn’t Micky. Given his height you would lure him to a secluded grove and drop a rock on his bonce.
Monkey boy is having a ‘mare.
yes Rocky, Bale is the one that missed 3 sitters. I didn’t recognize him at first – he has new ears
This is getting exciting
“he has new ears” 🙂
RL 9.16 😀😄
I occasionally have a kick-about with a friend’s Jack Russell, and we both went for the ball at the same time.
The result was that he grabbed the ball at the precise moment my booted foot connected with it. The ball and the dog went at least 15 feet in a graceful parabola much to my horror.
The upshot the dog, which I happened to like, got up thrilled that he had got the damned ball and ran back to me for more.
I went to hospital!
I had various antibiotics and stitches because one of his teeth went thru the ball, my boot and into my toe which bled profusely and hurt like buggery.
Not just a tough little blighter, but a sweet one too, as I lay on the ground in agony and yelling expletives, he just licked my face, and I did not like to think where that tongue had been. 🙂
Right. I bet Real score.
Rocky, it’s not something I do every day you know!
Ha Ha RA
When you say you have “a kick-about with a friend’s Jack Russell”…..
Us against Parma is a very good description of AM in this game.
come of it Micky – you boil live animals! Plain evil
He is very competitive, Micky, but I think he took it a bite too far. 🙂
Wow
Real will now go onto win it! Damn.
Bloody hell Micky. You are the new Crystals!
or us against Hull
Fantastic! They deserve it and I hope RM win now
And Ramos is drop dead gorgeous
HB. You have the strangest taste in men😳
AM’s whole team cost a third of Bale and deserve to win.
Come on you Reds
AM will do it!
OK, I am settled in front of the tele. come on Athletico
we have a new Crystals. where is the piranha, Rasp?
Khedira would be a great signing for us and looks marginalised at RM
Buy buy buy
Ramos? Gorgeous?? OK, now I get it.
Not to worry, Evonne, most chums on here are insane, to lesser to greater extent. Except me of course. 😛 You are in good company. 🙂
Crystals? Predictions?
arnie – you should see pictures of the hippy Raddy – a real babe!
excellent referring tonight
FA Cup, Europa and Cl all gone to extra time
The problem with Bale is that he has done time in the swamps, and Ronaldo in Old Toilet. Otherwise, RM would be fine.
Oh thank you HB but with your taste I am not sure that is a compliment 😀
Raddy: 🙂
bum
oh dear, Bale. 😦 gutted for AM
the defender should have stayed tall
Shame.
Evonne: I have to watch some of those Raddy pics, and clips of his band. 🙂
Raddy 🙂
Monkey boy has gone bananas celebrating
Is Casillas polish?
Bolleaux
such a shame
ya cannto beat class and rm have lots of that
I like MArcello, good player, had an excellent game
well, that was just to get the local boy on the score sheet. a shame
Simeone is a basket case!
Wonder whether John Terry will don an RM kit and go up for the cup?
Really have to feel for Atletico there. Played their hearts out, what a season they had. All their players can hold their heads up high and look back on an amazing season.
One more thing, the collective pressing, work rate and team spirit by the Atletico players was really something else. Really dortmund like, or should we now start calling it atletico like? Amazing stuff that, really enjoyed watching them play in the first half.
Morning All,
Sometimes football is so unjust and last night was one of those occasions; the scoreline was a travesty of justice.
We often say that Arsenal lack a Leader and a plan but we saw that passion. determination, tactics and a team of leaders doesn’t guarantee victory – sometimes the fates are against you.
And sadly last night a team of hugely expensive egoists won.
The only positives of the RM win were the poor performances of both Benzema and Khedira, both of whom I would live to see at the Emirates.
Sorry Raddy, but I am not sure why do you think it was a travesty of justice. Real were a better team sighwith more than 62% overall possession and despite heroic (and sometimes filthy) efforts from Atletice the scoreline reflected that.
Have a look at this stats
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/matchzone/index.html#s2013-c5-m750261
Motning Raddy,
I watched until 3-1, and have to slightly disagree. Come the second half of the 90, Real just got stronger and stronger, and the quality of their “takers on” like Di Maria, Ron, and Bale looked likely to finally win the day.
Gone off Benzema. The other day LB said he was no better than what we have, and I did “eh” a lot to myself.
While I still think he is better than what we have, I want something younger and even better.
HB/Micky. Part of the fun of football support is the differing opinions whilst watching the same event and you are both wrong!
Real won because AM ran out of steam and were unable to get out of their own half. The best TEAM lost against a team of brilliant individualists who fell to the ground every time they got touched in an attempt to cheat their way to victory. RM are an odious bunch of egoists.
Not that I am biased against them :-).
and Atletico is a team full of thugs, with the manager the worst of all
Come on Raddy, they were just like Hull last weekend. Hard working, well organized, excellent team spirit, and so what? Do you think Hull deserved to win?
Look Raddy, truth is, with yer hippy principles, you have to support the underdog, and whenever things go wrong, it’s just unfair and everyone is an imperialist bastard.
Fact is, both AM and RM are a bunch of foreigners, and therefore diving, cheating cry babies 🙂
Micky. Cannot argue with your final sentence even if it is written by an Imperialist oppressor and puppy killer. 😀
The final seconds when the repulsive genius of Ronaldo took his shirt off, flexed and screamed “It’s all about me and look at how amazing I am” made me sick.
evonne. Comparing Hull to the winners of La Liga ?
Quentin Didit….. from ….Pup Fiction !.
Raddy and Cockie 🙂
Must go.
Motning all.
Athletico played the wrong strategy of trying to park the bus for the final half hour. They were almost punished against Barca, should have learnt their lesson which they didnt, got undone yesterday.
Well done Real. But it again shows that a team of riches can be successful. Well we always knew that. But we are defiant and different.
We do not need rejects from other big clubs sold for astronomical prices. Just look at Luiz. 3 or 4 talented players for around 20mn each will do it for us. We will create a quality team not buy one.
We are proud. We are different. We are The Arsenal.
Phew. 🙂 🙂 🙂
Cockie. 🙂 Backwater Dogs as well
Raddy – no more than I compare Real to Arsenal. The similarities were in the way both matches were played and won.
Ronaldo makes me sick too. With his plucked eyebrows, manicured nails and not one hair out of place he is no different to Conchita Wurst.
If Conchita Wurst were a Gooner, I would have no problem with him/ her/ it. I might even give a hug after the FAC Final victory.
But Ronaldo is a piece of pompous ManUre (shit) from Old Toilet that even the Portuguese hate.
Now, having said that, perhaps the Portuguese hate Barroso more. 😛
is the cabinet empty today? or is Peaches still dreaming of the FAC Final? 😛
Morning all
I’m just having a look in the cupboard ………
That’ll be me looking in the cupboard not him 😉
Hi arnie
Shard has sent a very informative post about our squad numbers and how they comply with the homegrown rule and where we need to be careful who we add. It might be better used during the week when there are more people around.
I have another of Rocky’s Alternative Alphabet that could be used today ……….. what do you think?
We have a New Post ……………..