An Arsenal Arsenal Christmas Concert

Apologies to non regulars, but on this matchless Boxing Day (thanks a lot London Underground staff!) this is a little festive offering in praise of the motley bunch of characters who make blogging on AA such a comfort and joy throughout the year.

Normal service will be resumed tomorrow.

So with no further ado, I am pleased to present the Arsenal Arsenal Christmas Concert, at which the following timeless favourites will be performed:

God Bless Ye Terry, Mental Man

No matter how dire the performances, no matter how gloomy the outlook, we have always been able to rely on Terry popping up to remind us that the ghosts of his underpants are stirring and glory awaits for Arsenal. Thankyou Terry.

Jingle Kels

Those flowing silver locks must surely make the sound of sleigh bells when Kelsey is skipping across the bowling green with gay abandon…

Rudolph The Red Arsed Reindeer

“Will you guide my sleigh tonight?” asked Santa.

“Affirmative,” replied RudeArse. “Verily I will coxswain your hibernal perambulator this eventime.”

“Eh?” said Santa.

When A Child Is Born

For GiE, of course!

He’ll be the loudest Dad in the schoolyard.

A Fairytale of New York

For our Johnnie, keeping the flame alive among the New World Philistines.

I Saw Irish Kissing Santa Claus

She had no idea it was really Chas in a fake beard and 1971 home shirt.

Chas Nuts Roasting On An Open Fire

After Irish found out.

Dan Dan Merrily On High

Shock news: our veteran Blogger hits the spliffs…

While Sheep Hagger Watched His Flock By Night

See – even the relative newcomers to AA get a mention! Welcome to the blog Sheep – you have brought us many smiles already and long may it continue. Just get ready for Peaches gently suggesting you might like to write a Headline Post. Then not-so-gently suggesting it…

Raspin Around The Christmas Tree

What can I say? Let’s hear it for the old rocker who keeps this site bopping all year long…

In The Peach Midwinter

All is bleak and frozen… until someone agrees to write a match report and the sunshine returns. Thanks for giving us this playground to play in Peaches.

The First Big Al The Angels Did Say

Was for a certain poor Gooner in fields far away.

Living in Thailand for the “climate and the food,” eh Big Al? Yeah, right. We believe you.

O Little Town of Brig-le-ham

Somewhere up in Scotland, if memory serves me well. Is that right Brigham?

O Come O Come Evonnnuel

I’m not explaining this one. Even at Christmas.

Do They Know It’s Charybdis?

Once he starts laying into the purple conked Gorbalian they certainly do.

Winter Wonderman

Like the Rough Legged Buzzard and the Barnacle Goose, Wonderman is only an occasional winter visitor but it’s always nice to see him.

Silent Night

For Sharkey and 26May… who have been uncharacteristically quiet lately. Come on boys, we want to hear from you.

Mullet of Kintyre

Soon dealt with by our very own Prince of the Scissors, Mr GoonerMichael.

Have Yourself A Micky Didit Christmas

Which basically entails lots of smoked meat, healthy moorland walks and not making eye contact with the in-laws.

Joy To The Shard

Another of our super-positive Gunners this year.

It’s Beginning To Look A Lot Like Glicmas

Which basically means it’s X Rated. Sorry kids.

Mistletoe and Slime

As a newlywed, our Slim Ginger Gooner is going to be making full use of that mistletoe. Best not go into the slime bit though…

Christmas AA Alphabet

Season’s greetings to LB, PPP, VCC, JM, GN5, Kgooner, GoonerB and everyone else with a capital identity.

I Saw Three Ships

For Richie, who spends half his life swanning around the Med. And must have seen a sight more than three ships while doing so.

Rad Tidings

Which usually consist of reminding us all to keep our perspective after a bad result. Big Raddy has seen it all, done most of it and married several of it.

The Little Donald Boy

WeeDonald has been an interesting addition to AA this year. A feisty little fellow, but as stout hearted as Terry in his support of our great manager.

FrOZty The Snowman

He may be Down Under, but Oz is always an “upper” on AA.

Santa Claus, Is Tony Cummings In Town?

Santa: “No – he’s gone to Malta.”

The Double98 Days of Christmas

The world’s longest Christmas song: “On the 98th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me… one Champions League title, two ‘worldie’ signings, three players mended etc etc.”

Angels: “We Have Herb On High”

“And he keeps insisting that Chapman was the best Arsenal manager ever.”

Peace on Earth

For Buddhist Steve: stay chilled Steve, stay chilled…

All I Want For Christmas

Is a Carol with a title that provides a pun for Jonathan, ArsenalForever, Goonerjake, Neamann, Adrian, Reddawn, Carlito, Tomstoned, Barum and anyone else I’ve forgotten.

Happy Boxing Day fellow AA-ers.


58 Responses to An Arsenal Arsenal Christmas Concert

  1. Rasp says:

    Haha terrific ingenious post Rocky – your such a classy writer …. and as such, your Christmas accolade has to be ‘A Rocking Carol’ ……

  2. Cheers Rockstar.
    If Wenger was signing up writers Rocky, you would be on top of his list. (no im not saying you are cheap 😉 ) but you are indeed an “exceptional talent”

    Happy Boxing day, Happy St Stephens day to one and all on Arsenal Arsenal.

    Ps. Rocky, yesterday you implied that Evonne may have killed the blog. Now that may or may not be true. The way i saw it was that nobody wanted to come on and embarrasingly ‘slur’ their comments 😆 egg nog anyone? (rakija in my household)

  3. kgooner says:

    Happy Boxing day Rocky and the rest of the AAers! Bit ambivalent on our lack of a fixture today. On one hand, no game to occupy my festive period, on the other, a period of rest for our players.

  4. Red Arse says:

    What can one say regarding the inventiveness, and supreme craftsmanship of your writing Rock Of Ages? Brilliant — again! 😀

  5. Gooner In Exile says:

    Rocky superb, even on Boxing Day you supply something for AA to print…..can’t leave those Fleet Street days behind can you 😉

    Morning all, I trust all had an enjoyable day yesterday.

    Here’s to some good results today 🙂

  6. Red Arse says:

    I suppose it would be remiss of me if I did not continue the Christmas Theme if I did not say that you are;

    “The Rock Star of Bethlehem, shining your leading light and leading us frenetic bloggers and your learned Magi Authors to the AA footballing crib!”

    Go Rocket!!! 😛

  7. chas says:

    Have a swinging Boxing Day, Rocky.
    Thanks for all the brilliant posts throughout the year.

  8. Reddawn says:

    Well done Rocky, a good chuckle for Boxing Day. Looking forward to more of your fine posts in the new year.

  9. Sheep Hagger says:

    Hi all
    Great post Rocky, I enjoyed reading it.
    Mrs sheep also liked it,as I showed her and she chuckled.
    No game for AFC today shameless
    Have a good Boxing Day catch you all later

  10. chas says:

    This is the real reason Big Al went to Thailand.
    Pussy massage.

  11. Nice one the Rock “Sir” Alex really is the gift that keeps giving; just when you think he’s stopped churning out ill-informed invective he comes out with his pearler about how close VanJudas was to death as a result of a few pounds of plastic filled with air being kicked at him.

  12. Poogs says:

    I would really love the privilege of posting on Arsenal arsenal. Who to e-Mail a submission?

  13. chas says:

    See “Be Our Guest” at the top of the page.

  14. Rasp says:

    Hi Poogs, there is an open invitation to anyone who wishes to write for the site. The only criteria are that the post is in keeping with the ethos of AA – see ‘Be our guest’ at the top of the page.

    You can email your article to and we will work with you and offer assistance to prepare it for publication.

    So the answer is yes please …. get typing 😛

  15. CLARK KENT says:

    Terrific Piece. Thumbs up AA

  16. VCC says:

    Thanks for the mention Rockydelicious.

    Here’s to many more sparklers from your good self in 2013.

    Top Top blogster, Sir Ricky.

  17. RockyLives says:

    Happy Boxing Day everyone.

    I hope you’re all enjoying a great Christmas.

    I’m looking forward to seeing Aston Villa bounce back from their Chavski humiliation by beating the Spuds.

    We could do with the Chavs and Everton dropping points too.

  18. slime says:

    Perfect for Boxing Day Rocky,

    Hope everyone had a fantastic Christmas.

  19. evonne says:

    +++++++++++++++++++ hold on Rocky, my dogs have something to say ——++++++++++++++ ok, they are done now.

    Yes, it would be nice to see Villans shaking of that dreadful result. Not that I particularly like them 🙂

    I was laughing my socks off at your portrayal of the fellow sufferers; Jingle Kels being my favourite! Not sure what you meant about me, unless Peaches told you that I am frigid 🙂 Anyway, good laugh on such miserable day in the Lake District, so thank you.

    I am still fuming about the cancelled game

  20. evonne says:

    oh oh oh, just switched the Manyoo game on, come on you beautiful magpies!!!!!

  21. RockyLives says:

    There’s no such thing as a miserable day in the Lake District!

  22. evonne says:

    and the hairdryer time 🙂

  23. evonne says:

    fans booing own team off the pitch, ha ha ha ha, merry christmas you dirty mancs!!

  24. evonne says:

    but this is the North London part of the Lake District Rocky

  25. RockyLives says:

    Ah… I get it!

    Still raining then?

  26. goonermichael says:

    Newcastle are bossing the mancs.

  27. evonne says:

    and Fergie is lashing out at referees

    Yes, Rocky, raining, raining and then raining again. The ground is completely saturated with water, it is like swamps here

  28. evonne says:


  29. goonermichael says:

    Madrid will give the mancs a pasting

  30. RockyLives says:

    Nudge in the back on Van Judas there.

    Could have killed him.

    Jammy Mancs.

  31. RockyLives says:

    Well, no decent results for us so far.

    But Villa could still make it a happy Boxing Day.

  32. goonermichael says:

    My stream stopped before the valencia incident. Apparently he should have been off.

  33. Fooking oath he should have been sent off.

    Is it possible to HATE the manure scum more than you can love Arsenal? Borderline…

    Rocky, results did go our way when looking at the bigger picture. Its a billion dollar “crisis” at $hitty. Scraping past Reading only 1-0 and now losing 1-0 to Sunderland courtesy of an ex player (Adam Johnson) goal.

    Who says we cant catch 2nd place?

  34. Title is out of the question. Too many refs on the manure payroll, they’ve even signed up a few linesman 🙄

  35. Brigham says:

    Cheers Rocky, funny reading on a very wet and windy Boxing Day. I used to work in Scotland, bid not live there! lol

  36. VCC says:

    Aston Villa are not helping much. losing 2-0 to the Spuds.

  37. VCC says:

    ooops 3-0

  38. neamman says:

    well done. Merry Xmas all from Canada

  39. mickydidit89 says:

    Absolutely brilliant Rocky
    The reason i’ m not blogging is not because I lead some kind of rich and full life, its because my phone lins/internet are buggered
    This is the last straw and I’ll be ordering the sattelite broadband tomorrow
    Talk to you all again asap
    Hope all good in the GiE camp

  40. LB says:

    Harrah for Poogs

    Hey, I got a name check in the alphabet part of the carol.

    Thanks Rocky.

  41. LB says:

    Does Liverpool losing help us or are they too sad to care about?

  42. LB says:

    “The reason i’ m not blogging is not because I lead some kind of rich and full life”


    Unlike the rest of us. lol

  43. dandan says:

    Well done Rocky, Someone stole our match today and as always there is no smoking without fire. Saves on the “Wacky Baccy” though. 🙂

    Merry Christmas AA’s one and all, hope you had half the fun I did. Dont kids just make Christmas a truly magic time.

  44. Hi all

    Well those results didn’t exactly go our way did they 😦

    Anyone got a post for tomorrow …….

  45. Gooner In Exile says:

    Evening all….what a disappointing set of results.

    Wife was intent on not having a Christmas baby and she has achieved that….must admit I’m quite impatient when it comes to unwrapping presents, and would quite like to have more than half a glass of wine at some point over the festive season. Midwife to see tomorrow. We’ve done the curry, the bumpy road….only one thing for it…..I’m sleeping downstairs tonight 🙂

  46. SharkeySuresGhost says:

    Seasons greetings to all on AA

    New Years Res to post more often !!!

  47. SharkeySuresGhost says:

    Just how long have I been in my ‘sleeper cell’….GiEs baby is due any day now..??

  48. Gooner In Exile says:

    3 days ago Sharkey….fashionably late.

  49. oz gunner says:

    All class Rocky! Great write up.

    I hope all on AA had a great christmas and congrats to Mr and Mrs Exile on their new Arsenal baby. I hope all went well!

  50. Gooner In Exile says:

    Not yet Oz…..still waiting the fashionably late was the baby itself….thought my last post might be confusing.

  51. Rasp says:

    Morning GiE, it looks like your wee one is destined to be a Capricorn, if it arrives between Xmas and the New Year he/she could share the same birthday as yours truly 🙂

  52. Rasp says:

    We don’t have a post for today as yet …. a few lines to spark debate is all we need, I’m back at work so any offering however brief would be appreciated.

  53. Hello all, I’ve got a few lines I’ve put up in drafts if you think that’s useable Raspers.

  54. Rasp says:

    Morning all ….

    ……. New post ……

  55. Rasp says:

    Thanks chary, I’d just pushed the publish button when your offer came through. We still need posts for the days ahead so a chary masterpiece would be gratefully accepted.

  56. HaHaHerbert says:

    I wish you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

  57. RockyLives says:

    Same to you Herb

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