Wenger Auditions For “Stars In Your Eyes”; Gerrard’s Lead Role In “Boy Who Cried Wolf”

Stars In Your Eyes is making a special comeback for 2010 and tonight Cat Deeley, Arsene Wenger will be Lenny Kravitz.

Arsene as Lenny Kravitz

Arsene as Lenny Kravitz

Surely Arsene Wenger has got all the squad singing:

“So many tears I’ve cried
So much pain inside
But baby It ain’t over ’til it’s over
So many years we’ve tried”

So many years we’ve tried and failed but this year Gooners it can be different because as certain as I am Irish and I love Arsenal, IT AIN’T OVER TILL IT’S OVER!!

There are 12 games for Arsenal to win this title.  We don’t need to win them all nor do we need to play well in them all, we just need to score points in them all.

The Chavs stuffed up big time midweek. And they WILL stuff up again!

John ‘The Slut’ Terry has been given a few days off by Ancleotti and thankfully he decided he wanted to go a day early and left Saha in twice to secure all three points for Everton.

Cashley has plenty time to count his extra £5k a week now that he is out for the season. Bad news for England but good news for the rest of us because he was having a storming couple of months for the Chavs.

Oh, and a certain Jose Mourinho is waiting for them in the Champions League. That’ll be fun to watch. Two full blooded affairs I’m sure.

We’ve made Chelsea look good this season but they aren’t good. They have lost to Wigan, Everton,  and drawn away at Hull.

Yeah, they have beat us but they haven’t done what Champions in general do and that’s beat the smaller teams regularly. We’ve been better doing that this season.

Meanwhile, the Mancs are relying on Rooney and his goals. He is dragging them kicking and screaming through this league.

Red Nose and his team are 5 points ahead of us while the Chavs are 6 points ahead of us.

Joy to the World they still have to play each other so one or both will drop points and Liverpool may nick some points off them somehow.

The Mancs won the league last season but secured only FOUR POINTS against the so-called big four. We have topped that by two this season thanks to beating the Scousers twice.

The media and other moaners will say you should beat the best if you want to be the best but I couldn’t give a stuff if we win the league by beating neither of Chelsea or United – all I care is that we are top of the pile at the end.

Besides, we did it the special way with the Invincibles so why not try something a little different?

Talking about being a little different, lets go off on a different tangent and talk about Stevie Me and his new starring role as the boy who cried wolf.

Since Wednesday night he has been “dismayed” at how a penalty wasn’t given against Fab4 for the handball in added time.

Its called karma you dirty, snivelling, cheating little prick.

Innocent ickle Stevie was looking for a penalty when Cesc clearly raised his hand to the ball but the little boy is crying wolf here because Cesc got away with one bit of cheating when St.Stevie Me of Gerrard gets away with cheating game after game.

Steven you are a top player but an absolute disgrace. Your diving increases tenfold when Liverpool go behind, you stick your studs into other players legs with little care for their welfare and then you cry “foul”…

SHUT IT!!

Oh, and you ain’t ever going to win a League Medal either, HA!

You can see Stevie as the boy who cried wolf every weekend in the English Premier League. However, shall you not be able to wait that long then tune into the UEFA Champions Leag…….. oops sorry!!

C’mon Gooners, heads up. Wednesday has given us a glimpse at the light at the end of the tunnel, this season to date has proved it ain’t over till its over.

103 Responses to Wenger Auditions For “Stars In Your Eyes”; Gerrard’s Lead Role In “Boy Who Cried Wolf”

  1. Rasputin says:

    Morning Irish,

    Brilliant! …. a classic rantathon – are you sure you haven’t got any cockney in you? 😆

    Unfortunately I won’t be around much to enjoy all the responses, but I’m sure you’ll have fun……….

  2. irishgunner says:

    😆 Thanks Rasp.

    Sadly the time difference means I’ll only be around for a few hours myself 😦 bit of a bummer

  3. Morning Irish

    What a way to start the day – I’m chuckling so much I’m gonna have to read it again, thankyou 🙂

    Raddy – do you want to copy and paste your comment from the last post on here?

    Morning rasp and all

  4. irishgunner says:

    Cheers Peaches.

    I even worked extra long on the photo 😉

  5. Song got injured the other night aswell as Arshavin. We almost get to a team and then they start dropping like flies again …………

    As you say in your post, all we have to do is keep hoping we’ll get points from our games – easy 😉

  6. irishgunner says:

    Song is a worry – hopefully its only some form of strain.

    It was the medial knee ligaments that KO’d Gallas last season wasn’t it?

  7. Big Raddy says:

    Good Morning All.

    I am ambivalent about Cashley’s injury. On the one hand, anything that hinders Chelsea is a positive, but on the other., Cole is an essential element of the England team, one of the few real World class players, and I want England to excel in SA.

    Let’s hope he recovers early- May.

    AA’s hamstring isn’t good. Our players start with strains which develop into a 6 week lay off.

  8. irishgunner says:

    Be back in a while.

  9. Big Raddy says:

    Excellent post Irish.

    The Stevie G quotes really annoy me, but I guess if one has a life surrounded by sycophants one doesn’t learn self reflection. The man is clearly a cheat, but perhaps he is a reflection of the city he represents 🙂

    The photo of AW is great.!!

  10. London says:

    Morning Irish

    That was a very entertaining read You can see “Stevie Me staring in the boy who cried wolf every weekend in the English Premier League” is very funny.

    I am a bit lazy when it comes to keeping up with other team’s news: is Cashley, the poor lamb, really out for season, what’s wrong with him? How did he do it?

  11. I was just going to say that even though he’ll star for England I’m not in the least upset that Cashley has an injury that will keep him out for the rest of the season – thats cos I’m mean.

    I think hes fractured his ankle London

  12. London says:

    I have just read that Song has got an injury, does anyone know anything about that?

    Morning Peaches.

  13. While reading the Lenny Kravitz lyrics I can see out of the corner of my eye Arsene holding the premiership trophy aloft – nice touch 🙂

  14. Big Raddy says:

    Knee ligaments London. Thankfully we have no game at the w/e

  15. London says:

    Morning BR

    Knee ligament problems sound a bit more serious and lengthy than just seven days, is there any suggestion that he might be fit for Porto?

  16. Big Raddy says:

    http://www.sport.co.uk/news/Football/34059/Song_knee_ligament_damage_confirmed.aspx

    Doesn’t seem too terrible. My knee ligament damage took 2 months to heal, but then I don’t have the Arsenal Medical team 😉

  17. Alfa says:

    I saw he was limping towards the end of the match, I vaguely recall him getting whacked but he seemed to run it off.

    I’m more worried about Mozart, he hasn’t seemed fit for a while to me. Sometimes these injuries come out and then it’s one thing after another, some underlying problem.

    London, Cashley and I think Donovan went to kick the ball at the same time and Cashley lost out.

  18. Poor cashly 😦

    I want Mozart to just struggle on now, its not worth looking into an injury for him, he’ll be out for months again!!!!!! If he can walk he can play.

  19. Alfa – I want to put up a link to a premiership table any ideas? I tried the sky sports link but it just goes to the site and not to the page. I copied and pasted the page but it obviously wasn’t an URL because only the address came up.

  20. London says:

    If he can walk he can play…..wow, your a tough task master 😉

  21. I’m worried about us having these 6 points deducted if Pompey get wound up – we won these points fair and square, wouldn’t it be better to just assume Pompey wouldn’t get any more points and give the three points to all the teams that haven’t played them yet.

  22. London says:

    Opps, correction, Task Madame 😉

  23. The thing is London – I’m sure there were times that Rosicky could have played in between all his treatments, I saw him running and training at the open day August 2008 – the next time I saw him was at Barnet in July 2009.

    I just think that if hes broken somewhere but he can still play he should.

  24. Newgun69 says:

    I couldn’t agree with you anymore any more fellow gooner! Especially the Gerrard ‘diving’ FACTS! Funny how he seems to get away with it in every match he plays in and the pundits never mention it! Come to think of it, seems the same with Rooney as well and I remember a certain Mr Slut himself saying that its not in the English mentality to dive! Do us a favour! Great post indeed 🙂

  25. London says:

    I can hear it coming…..if he hasn’t lost his hands he can write the headline post 😉

    Last one, I will leave it now….I don’t know about you but as we don’t know what each other looks like I try and imagine and I can’t help but picture you in a lion tamers suit with a chair in one hand and a whip in the other…..slow news day lol

  26. London says:

    Hello Newgun69

    Good comment I hope you come and visit our little comminity again, new members are always welcome.

  27. irishgunner says:

    Welcome Newgun,

    😆 the funniest was Gerrard saying he’d never dive, he was too honest ha ha

  28. kelsey says:

    We sure have a talent in Irishgunner.

    With regards to Gerrard, I hardly noticed him in the match on Wednesday. He hasn’t got the impact of say two years ago.

    With regards to injuries,Arshavin is the one I fear may be out for a while.I wrongly assumed on Wednesday that it was strange that he was subbed just as he was getting into the game,but obviously he was injured.

    Any news on vela ?

  29. kelsey says:

    Did anyone hear Alan Sugar on the BBC and Sky talking about Pompey’s plight.He said Arsenal were the role model of how to run a club.Furthermore he said if any business goes bust it is crazy that the administrators can then sell the club to any Tom Dick or Harry for £1.

  30. irishgunner says:

    Thanks Kelsey 😳

    Arshavin has been injured for some time, I think he was playing when he shouldn’t have, I hope we don’t pay too dearly for it now.

    Not heard anything on Vela.

  31. kelsey says:

    By the way this may have been mentioned before,but Jack was mighty impressive,especially in the first half in his debut for Burnley against City

  32. irishgunner says:

    Bolton Kelsey 😉

  33. Newgun69 says:

    Thanks for the welcome folks. I sure will be back. Nice to join in with what seems like my sort of place on the net! Anywhere that has an ‘honest approach’ to football is my kinda place and you’re all Arsenal fans to boot which is a bonus 🙂

  34. irishgunner says:

    From AA23s website:

    Today, Andrey Arshavin visited a private hospital in central London. The day before he got injured during the game against Liverpool. Medical examination revealed that the Arsenal player had got a hamstring problem.
    According to Andrey, he hopes to come out on the pitch on February 20. However, the process of treatment and recovery can take up to two weeks. We thank all those people who support Andrey with their words and wishes for quick recovery.

  35. Morning kelsey – nice to have you back, what do you think of my idea to give all the remaining fixtures as a loss to Pompey rather than take the points off the teams that have already beaten them?

  36. kelsey says:

    Bolton, Burnley, same thing really 😉

  37. I hope Jack plays for Bolton this weekend – they’re playing Spuds in the cup

  38. irishgunner says:

    Yep 😆 same manager and all ha ha (well kinda)

  39. irishgunner says:

    Peaches – I think when you have a good think about that idea its not very good.

    They beat Liverpool so its not a given teams would beat them.

    Also try this hypothetical hat on:

    West Ham played Pompey twice and lost twice.

    Bolton played Pompey once and lost and then got 3 points as a result of Pompey going into administration/liquidation.

    West Ham get relegated by two points and Bolton stay up by virtue of the three points they got “against” Pompey.

    Doesn’t seem fair does it?

  40. Not fair to them – but very fair to us 😳

  41. irishgunner says:

    True :mrgreen:

    People are odd. I wanted to write an article different from football so did one on my latest sporting hero 😆 Serena Williams and two black Americans keep coming on calling me racist eve though I stated I’m a Serena fan 😆

    Americans 🙄 😆

  42. How bizarre – was the article complicated 😳

  43. kelsey says:

    It can’t happen.There would be no fair solution for anyone.I think they will be saved,deducted so many points, possibly make an exception to the rule and make them sell any of their players they can or at least loan them out so that the wages are taken care of, even if they have to play their reserves as they are going down in any case.
    One of the former owners,owns all the adjacent land to the west and north of Fratton Park and apparently he is owed millions.

    IMO this all started with Mandrovic(sp) when he and Old Arry were there,and the debts have escalated.

    There is no real solution to this problem,which is a shame.

  44. irishgunner says:

    😆 I don’t do complicated Peaches

    http://bleacherreport.com/articles/342391-the-two-sides-of-the-serena-williams-coin-arrogant-but-ace

    I’ve resorted to calling them racist seen as they are so besotted by it. I’m having fun even if they’re not ha ha

  45. kelsey says:

    Has anyone notced the likeness of Lucas in Eastenders and Babel of Liverpool.Quite uncanny. I haven’t got the know how to put the pictures up.

    Oh by the way,anyone want to vote on Walcott. Should he keep been given a chance, should he go out on loan or what.Selling him would make a loss, or do we wait another few years for him to blossom.

  46. irishgunner says:

    Its all ‘Arry’s fault, he should be relegated.

  47. kelsey says:

    Your wish may be granted Irish, he goes on trial in April for tax evasion.

  48. charybdis1966 says:

    Afternoon all – Maire I agree, I reckon ‘ole Twitchy should have his managers license revoked for wrongfully passing himself off as a custodian of Pompey’s playing assets.

  49. irishgunner says:

    That could be fun to follow Kelsey.

  50. irishgunner says:

    Chary – I agree

  51. kelsey says:

    very quiet about theo on here 😉

  52. Morning chary

    Actually I think there are a couple of solutions……

    The FA could step in to protect the integrity of the competition that is the Premiership and pay the tax bill to keep Pompey competing for the rest of the season.

    or

    All the other clubs in the Premiership could club together to meet the tax bill in order for the competition to run for the rest of the season and be owed the money.

  53. kelsey – Raddy did a post on Walcott the other day, do you want to do a poll on him for one day next week.

  54. irishgunner says:

    Or Pompey could just pay their own tax.

    Horrible to see any club go under but don’t look after your finances and you deserve what you get. Feel sorry for the fans but not the idiots at the top.

  55. charybdis1966 says:

    For me Kelsey, I think Theo has till the end of the season t prove his worth. We have a minimum of 14 games left(and a max of 19) during which time I suspect Theo will show us whether we should retain/loan/sell. If it was down to me if someone came in for an offer of £15m+ I would let him go if we could be guaranteed Wenger would get a right winger who was ready to play. But we all know what happened in the last 2 transfer windows so the money in will probably get trousered by the board and not be seen again.

  56. charybdis1966 says:

    And hi Peaches – got your whip today? 😮

  57. London says:

    I think Portsmouth should be allowed to fail, it will ultimately benifit clubs like Arsenal who try and run their business’ within their means.

  58. irishgunner says:

    I think Birmingham are the only club in the EPL not in debt and if they are its minuscule.

    As far as I know German clubs are not allowed to go into debt.

  59. charybdis1966 says:

    But isn’t everyone in Europe allowed to go into debt, not just the Krauts, Maire?

  60. charybdis1966 says:

    That was a sneaky edit there !

  61. I agree Portsmouth should be allowed to fail, I’m not suggesting that the rest of the premiership rescue them as a club but the FA are very quick to dole out their punishments but also allow clubs like Man U and Liverpool to be run at a loss – its double standards.

    Its laughable to allow certain ‘glamorous clubs’ to get away with it but others to fall on the sword.

    The Premiership is a competition and as such it should be allowed to run to the finishing line. If Portsmouth get wound down then the whole competition suffers – like athletes being on performance enhancing drugs, the mancs and the dippers compete unfairly and the FA turns a blind eye.

  62. irishgunner says:

    😳 darn thought no-one saw it Chary 😉

    ha ha it was pretty redundant without the “not” in there.

  63. irishgunner says:

    Peaches – If I was in charge Liverpool, the Mancs, Chelsea and City would all be gone.

    Spurs must have money so they can stay – wouldn’t finish ahead of us anyway.

  64. charybdis1966 says:

    Well this old fellah occasionally notices stuff.

    It is good commonsense stuff from the krauts so how Bayern can afford Ribery on their books I don’t get.
    Perhaps he likes all the turkish mosques he can go to there?

  65. irishgunner says:

    AA23 is out of the Porto game according to AA23

  66. charybdis1966 says:

    What should the tactics be at the Stadio do Dragao? Do we go for a nil-nil shut out or try to get an away goal? I believe we should try for a 1-1 more than set out our stalls for nil nil.
    Who can forget being put out by Valencia by away goals about 4 seasons ago (it was a Carew goal that sunk us)?

  67. We’ll never play for a draw – even if AW sets the team out for that they won’t be able to help themselves going for it. Look at the other night 1-0 up 10 minutes to go, really needing to hold on for the win and they’re pumping balls up gungho looking for a second goal.

    It would be nice to think the team could play in a patient contained manner not leave huge spaces behind so that we get hit on the break but ………

  68. irishgunner says:

    We need an away goal – its so vital.

  69. charybdis1966 says:

    We do seem to have rather a swash buckling approach to most games Peaches and a healthy dose of conservatism in going forward when it’s not absolutely necessary would make for less chances of throwing leads way, BTW so no whip today then?

  70. irishgunner says:

    I’d go:

    Almunia
    Sagna
    Gallas
    Vermaelen
    Clichy
    Song
    Fabregas
    Diaby
    Rosicky
    Bendtner
    Nasri

  71. Its under the chair 😉

  72. I’m really pleased to have Nik back in the squad – even if he only gets a couple of goals for himself his presence is really important.

    How are Porto doing in their own league anyone know?

  73. charybdis1966 says:

    Good girl, Peaches.

    Mairé – I hope Song is available too, the only alternative for me would be to re-jig the midfield with Diaby , Cesc and Nasri in the middle with Bendy up top and Eduardo on the left and Theo on the right. It might also be worth sticking with Eboue at right back as Sagna has looked tired lately.

  74. irishgunner says:

    3rd – 6 points off the top 😯 weird… just like us.

    Except our league is harder of course.

  75. irishgunner says:

    Chary – Darn yeah forgot about Song’s injury, hopefully he’ll be okay.

    Is Eddie going to be back?

  76. charybdis1966 says:

    Yes Eddy is back by all accounts Mairé (BTW – is the accent correct?) and I think the eniterly competent AFC medical team(slight snigger there) will be assessing Song Billlong’s injury at some point today. In my mind I’d rather be cautious with him and rest him Wednesday if he is not tip-top as I don’t think Porto are especially physical(when I saw them play at the Grove in the previous season they looked lightweight and their supporters sounded like a bunch of girls!) and Billong’s presence will be far more vital against the Mackems. I don’t know if all their midfield will be fit by the 20th but Cattermole and Cana will offer a different challenge to the Pork ‘n Cheesers.

  77. irishgunner says:

    Hulk and Bruno Alves are the physical players for Porto – have to watch them at corners.

    The accent or fada is over the a (Máire)

  78. charybdis1966 says:

    I saw the Hulk play then Màire and he didn’t seem that imposing to me although he only came on as a sub and didn’t really get into the game much. You could be right about Alves though – best get Diaby to mark him.

  79. Big Raddy says:

    Away goal is vital at Porto. We can and will score there.

    Pork ‘n Cheesers.!

  80. irishgunner says:

    Can’t say I’ve seen much of Porto this season Chary.

    They are generally a different side in the knock out stages though. We beat them easily in the group stages last season and they made hard work of beating our kids but then they gave United a very hard affair in the QFs.

  81. These are the fixtures for FA Cup this weekend – might be something to talk about

    Saturday 13th February

    12:00 Chelsea vs Cardiff
    12:30 Southampton vs Portsmouth Live on ITV1
    15:00 Derby vs Birmingham
    15:00 Reading vs West Brom
    17:15 Man City vs Stoke Live on ITV1

    Sunday 14th February

    13:30 Bolton vs Tottenham Live on ITV1
    15:00 Fulham vs Notts County
    15:45 Crystal Palace vs Aston Villa Live on ITV1

  82. charybdis1966 says:

    Yeah Radders, it’s so much against our natural instincts to aim for a nil nil I suppose; it’s really just a matter of how much adventure we’re going to show.
    I see Isvestia.com (Arse.com) are plugging Eastmond as a stand in for Billong(our aussie-cameroonian) so maybe that’s what we’ll see as I’d suggest Wenger will want to keep Diaby where he was positionally on Wednesday.

  83. I really like Eastmond – hes young and gonna be thrilled to be given another opportunity in that position in the first team. Good for him – take your chance boychick and show Denilson how its done.

    Denilson has been poor since he came back from injury – I often wonder whether he feigned that ‘getting shot’ injury against Everton – he must have know that apart from the deflected goal he was having a mare.

  84. charybdis1966 says:

    The thing is though Peaches, I fear a Champions League knockout game may require a bit more know how than the honest endeavour he has – I reckon he’d be suited more to the Mackem’s game if Billong isn’t available but we’ll never know till it happens and I don’t think we’ll have the luxury of choosing when we play him – injuries will dictate that.

  85. Our injuries this season have really messed us up – we only just know (sort of) what our best 11 would be to take us to the end of the season and thats without a tip-top keeper – if Denilson could be relied on to be the crab of last season then hes fine but he doesn’t seem to know what he should be doing lately.

    Surely Ramsey comes before Eastmond anyway – he not a crabber but hes more intelligent and possibly more reliable.

  86. charybdis1966 says:

    I think Rambo is more of a replacement for Cesc than Song Billabong – young Aaron isn’t a DM is he Peaches?

  87. No he isn’t but as square pegs and round holes are our speciality maybe hes more developed as a player than Eastmond and can be utilised.

    What I mean is that if hes intelligent he could do that job if Song is injured rather than a Denilson who is playing poorly

  88. Ramsey isn’t going to develop if he only gets to be Cescs replacement sometimes – the boy needs to play in games, if he sits behind Cesc it also gives him the chance to be on the field and be part of Cescs play.

  89. charybdis1966 says:

    Of course, inserting squad members into positions for which they are not suited is a Wenger tendency so in that way Rambo could be played as a DM. If Wenger wants to play Rambo then I reckon reverting to 4-4-2 would be necessary, i.e. Rambo, Diaby, Cesc & Nasri in the middle and Eddy and Bendy up top.

    I’d position Denilson on the far pitch at Clissold Park.

  90. charybdis1966 says:

    Talking of Rambo needing to get game time in, has he at least been on the bench lately?

  91. 🙂 Agree about Denilsons best position 😆

  92. I thought Rambo was on the bench the other night but don’t quote me on it.

    Although our 4-3-3 is really 4-6 or 4-5-1 I can’t see AW returning to 4-4-2 – if he had any idea of doing so he would have pushed someone up with Eduardo or Arshavin or play Vela or JET

  93. Even Diaby up front is a good plan – we just end up with too many littl’uns in the middle, still it worked for Spain…………..

  94. charybdis1966 says:

    Or if you believe some we play 4-1-2-1-1 or 4-1-2-2 with a fair degree of fluidity. Wenger is slow to change his ideas on formation – he stuck with 4-4-2 for over 210 years, so I agree I don’t think we’ll see any change in formation anytime soon. If we must change, how about something really retro like the “W” “M” formation?

  95. charybdis1966 says:

    I think Diaby is best off surging on from midfield as Bendy will have to occupy the target man(not for high balls, for balls forward to hold up till the attacking mids arrive)role till the end of the season. You’re right – it’ll be smurf time again in midfield if we take Diaby out of there.

  96. Big Raddy says:

    Exactly Peaches. A oood littl’un is better than an average Big’un. But hopefully AS will be back for Sunderland and the problem will disappear.

    Do you realise that excluding RvP ( a vital cog) we are at full strength. Sure we have some niggles, but JD and Vela are not first choice,

    Now is our time….

  97. London says:

    I might be wrong but I am working on the basis that if we get past Porto we have Van Persie back for the quarter finals.

  98. London says:

    Wenger always plays 4.5.1 in European away games, always.

  99. kelsey says:

    Don’t under estimate Porto.UInbeaten at home this season. The away goal will be vital.

  100. London – I don’t think you should hold your breath on Robin being back before the semis – thats a nice thought though 😉

  101. Morning all

    There is a NEW POST

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