Written by MickyDidIt89

Shrouded in a cloak of despondency as I was yesterday, to say nothing of a virus that will almost certainly condemn me to time in intensive care, I retired to bed last night with several bottles of stimulants lapping within, only to awake this morning with the thought that the only way forward was to adopt a siege mentality. Up with the drawbridge and down with the portcullis kind of stuff. All this castle speak brings me on to my brilliant idea. Now while I am very well known to myself for my brilliant ideas, I genuinely feel I have unearthed a solution and an opportunity that the more vapid observer will have failed to spot.

We, The Arsenal, ought to break away and form an Independent State. Stay with me for a moment, this is not so silly. Think Monaco or even The Vatican for that matter. I mean how hard could it possibly be? Ok, so we are going to have to seize some territory from the good people of Islington, but we already own large chunks of what we need. I would like to see Highbury returned to its rightful owners and become The Barracks. These would naturally house The Red and White Army.

Of course life would be Tax Free for anyone working within our borders, and as such, we will become stinking rich overnight without the need for sugar daddies. So it would be goodbye to Stan and Usmanov and hello to a new leader. Now for the sensitive bit.  A Republic or a Monarchy. On this issue I welcome suggestions, although as someone who likes his history and continuity (which is why I have always been a fan of the Hillwoodies), I propose the latter. Either way, we have the chance to spawn a new dynasty.

I understand there would be one or two things to sort out. Season Tickets are replaced by passports. That is simple enough. Our King (or Queen) would have limited powers under the new constitution. Naturally, due to our enormous new found wealth, alcohol would be free and available before, during and after all games. Of course we would find ourselves liberated from the beaurocratic shackles of Islington Health and Safety to say nothing of  Brussels or UEFA. Just think of the opportunities. Independent TV Rights. This list is endless and all good.

Frankly, I fail to see flaws, obstacles or any downside whatsoever.

King Tone works for me.

Now where are those pills?