On Saturday we celebrated St Totteringham’s Day.

I know, I know, this was supposed to be the season when the pribbling, flap-mouthed fustilarians* from N17 would overcome the Forces of Light and begin a reign of darkness and terror.

Just like last year.

And the year before. And before that. And so on.

In fact the very first St Totteringham’s Day was celebrated exactly a century ago in the 1910/11 season.  It was the Lily Livereds’ second season in the top flight and they were quick to establish what would become a long pattern of inferiority, finishing in 15^th position (five places below a decidedly average Woolwich Arsenal).

In the century that has passed since, we have celebrated this happy occasion no fewer than 47 times. The figure would be much higher but for the fact that our faltering neighbours have had a habit of dropping out of the top flight from time to time. Well, that and the interventions of The Kaiser and Mr Hitler: in both World Wars regular league football was suspended.

Of course there have been some years when, despite the possibility of there being a St Totteringham’s Day, it never happened.

In those years the sun seldom shone, people talked of a foul miasma in the air, dogs whelped in the streets, livestock were struck barren and crops were visited by pestilential blight.

Thankfully we have not had to suffer such ill times for 16 full and happy years. Indeed many of the current Arsenal squad are too young to have any memory of those dark days.

Nevertheless, it’s worth reminding ourselves of the origins of this important festival.

St Totteringham himself was a strange figure, dating from the Middle Ages.

I have borrowed the following short biography from Butler’s Lives of the Saints:

Totteringham was born in a swampy, unhealthy hamlet some six miles north of Charing Cross in the year 1401AD. He always believed it was auspicious to have entered this world in a year that ended with a 1.  A bent and weasly man of ill favoured visage, he nevertheless gained a small group of followers by foretelling a glorious future that would soon be visited upon him and those who believed in him. “Next year,” he would chant as he walked in robes of all white, “Next year. Yea, our time will come. One day! One day! One day!” His piety was such that people, even in his lifetime, came to refer to him as “Saint” Totteringham.

However, after more than three decades of such prophesy his followers did cease to believe him and, in their great disappointment, exacted a terrible revenge. He was beaten severely then strapped to the foremost part of a bombard [a medieval cannon], which was then fired. Most of his human remains were never found, having been shot straight out of his robe. The robe itself was bloodily stained in the body (where the cannonball had impacted) but the white sleeves remained miraculously unmarked. His erstwhile followers adopted this red-body-white-sleeves as their preferred form of apparel thenceforth as a refutation of all that “Saint” Totteringham had stood for. A clerical inquiry subsequently disclosed that Totteringham, far from being a pious man, had in fact been a swindler, a fraud and a tax evader. He also had a twitch. Consequently, despite having been ‘cannoned’ he was never cannonised, though the saintly prefix remains to this day as an ironic title and a reminder to others not to follow false prophets.

So there you have it.

We Gunners may all have our differences, we may disagree about what’s best for our wonderful club. But we can all join together to wish each other a Very Happy St Totteringham’s Day.

*  pribbling: ignorant and weak

fustilarian: a low fellow, a stinkard, a scoundrel

Definitions from the Dictionary of Elizabethan Insults

RockyLives

This post is based on a conversation between one of the Arsenal Arsenal regular contributors and two individuals loosely connected with our club. It took place before Sunday’s game against Manchester United.

I would not normally pass on unsubstantiated comments, but Carlito11 (the AA regular) is a mature and responsible informant and he believes there is no reason to doubt what he was told.

In Carlito’s own words: “I had an interesting meet up pre-match with a couple of youngish foreign lads who were both qualified UEFA coaches and, more interestingly, mates of one of our first teamers. They divulged (but were keen not to be leaking) that our captain is not particularly well liked in the dressing room and is seen as thinking himself better than the others.”

At this point, if you object in principle to the reporting of second hand intelligence, then I understand and I expect you will stop reading.

But what struck me about Carlito’s information was how plausible it felt, for two reasons:

• Cesc’s demeanour and body language has been quite negative at times this season. He has not looked as if he is enjoying his football. In fact, sometimes he looks like he’s carrying the world on his shoulders. I know this is not scientific, but it’s my gut feeling from having watched him over several years.
• The much talked-about mental fragility of our team this season seems, to me, to betoken some sort of inner conflict within the squad. If the players were united as one, I believe they would fight harder for each other. I realise I am speculating here, but, again, it’s a gut feeling.

If it’s true that at least some of the players do not like Cesc it’s a pretty sad state of affairs – and maybe gives some extra weight to Arsene Wenger’s comments last week that the captaincy had been a burden on him.

Not that it’s essential to like your captain. I don’t suppose many of the Manchester United players liked Roy Keane when he was captain, but they certainly respected and feared him and would do what he told them.

My worry with Cesc is that his teammates probably don’t fear him either. Presumably they respect him for his footballing abilities (and for being a World Cup winner) but is that enough?

This has been a strange season for our captain, coming after a summer of constant speculation about his desire to move to the Catalonian National Diving Team followed by that WC win.

People have been quick to blame his demeanour on a desire to be elsewhere. I don’t think it’s as simple as that. I believe he is passionate about Arsenal, and even more so about his manager.

But maybe it’s another reason why he has seemed remote to his colleagues. What might seem arrogance to others may just be preoccupation or distraction. I would be surprised if Cesc really feels himself to be better than his teammates – but it’s a problem if that’s how it seems to some of them.

Either way, if this reported issue has any grounding in truth it is incumbent on the manager to deal with it. We thought we had rid ourselves of most of our dressing room squabbles with the departures of Adebarndooor and Wee Willie Gallas.

My solution (it’s easy being an armchair quarterback) would be for Arsene to persuade Cesc to relinquish the armband next season to concentrate on his own game.

I mentioned in comments at the weekend the most famous example of this strategy working: in 1989 Ian Botham gave up the captaincy of the England cricket team after 12 straight Test defeats. His next Test as an ordinary member of the team? Against Australia at Headingley, where he almost single-handedly destroyed the Aussies on the way to recapturing the Ashes for England.

Crucially, Cesc would have to give up the captaincy, not have it taken from him. We want him to be at his best for us and we certainly should not want him to leave. I keep reading comments about how Arsenal should cash in and sell him this summer.

If he really, really wants off, then maybe that’s fair enough. But if we can keep him we should – and here’s why:

Our win rate this season in EPL games in which Cesc started: 62% (with 24% draws and only 14% losses).

Our win rate in games Cesc did not start: 43% (with 36% draws and 21% losses).*

We need Cesc because we are better with him in the team.

But we also need to be united in the dressing room.

Harmony is not just a hairspray. It’s also an important ingredient of most successful teams.

RockyLives (with thanks to Carlito 11)

* I included the game in which Cesc went off injured after 14 minutes in the list of games he did not start.

Written by CarlitoII

Memories of singing, dancing and grinning from ear to ear at halftime on November 21st 2010 have been plaguing me and many other supporters ever since that fateful second half when twitchy switched it around and we contrived to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. It was the start of a recurring theme this season, and it was started by our greatest rivals- “them from down the road”.

I put it to you, Gooners and Goonerettes, that tonight’s game is the most important of our season. Not because it could take us to within 4 points of the league leaders, not because we have to get the bragging rights back, but because this team needs to prove to themselves, to their manager and to us that they have it in them to redress the wrongs of that game and subsequent seismic jolts of this season. That is where the doubt set in, and doubt is like a thief, it steals the possibilities from your life.

The players doubt, the fans doubt. It’s all over twitter and the blogosphere. To those who doubt I offer you this:

“A person who doubts himself is like a man who would enlist in the ranks of his enemies and bear arms against himself. He makes his failure certain by himself being the first person to be convinced of it.”

Alexandre Dumas (French Novelist)

In other words- doubt the team and you might as well support the Sp*rs! I know there are many Gooners who prefer to spend their energy supporting the good guys than hating those “cock n ball”s from the less salubrious parts of North London. But today, those emotions go hand in hand. We need to strike a counterblow for our good and their bad. We need to settle the score. In short, tonight is about REVENGE!

Arsène Wenger did not give a press conference yesterday, much to the chagrin of the journalists who make their living by spinning his words. And I know why. Because Arsène knows… that this is about retribution and he could never allow himself to say that in public, to the press. The fact that this morning’s papers are full of exactly that kind of spin on a straightforward Cesc interview perfectly justifies his stance.

Revenge is a mighty motivator, make no mistake about this- we will turn up tonight because every one of these players is playing for belief- in themselves, from their manager and from the fans.

And I can give you other (concrete) reasons for carrying that hope through your day and into tonight’s clash: Our key defensive men are all back and aside from Sagna have had a match to play themselves into a bit of form. Big Johan made us look like a different team with his assuredness at the back and I never panic with Szczesny in goal. I feel for Eboue after a generally decent performance in regulation time on Sunday, but Bac isn’t called “Mr. Reliable” for nothing.

As long as they can keep their heads in the cauldron of hate, I believe they can repel anything thrown at them. Ahead of them, Song is also available and I believe he will play. I know not everyone shares my faith in him, but we are a far more solid and coherent team defensively when he plays.

But my main grounds for optimism are this: we are playing away. Our away form is considerably better than our home form. The inflexible and recently derided 4-2-3-1 system works much better when the other team try and win the game, and there is no chance the Spuds will sit back against us on their own turf. I think it’s also significant that our away support makes almost as much noise as the Emirates does- sometimes even more!

It is also worth stating that, despite having some fantastic players, most of their team are not in great form, in particular Defoe has had a very poor season by his standards.

So, with hope and belief in my heart, my team for tonight would be:

I think Wenger made an error in starting with Walcott on Sunday and bringing on Arshavin as a sub, I hope he will do the reverse at WHL so Theo can terrorize them in the second half. Wilshere will probably come off after 60” for Diaby (who finally looks like he’s plinking* TM RockyLives).

For pride and victory…

Come on you rip roaring gunners!

Written by Wonderman

It was encouraging to learn the team news by way of sky sports as I came out of Highbury and Islington station. Both Szczesny and Djourou had been restored to the starting line up as had been hinted earlier in the week and Song was passed fit.

I was concerned with the new found confidence of Carroll and Djourou was just the ticket. The only bad news was  that Sagna was still injured, but after Eboue’s performance last week I was not overly concerned ( how ill judged that would prove).

Before the game a minute silence was impeccably observed in tribute to the late Asrenal Director Danny Fiszman and those Liverpool supporters who died at Hillsborough.

We started with Szczesny in goal, Eboue, Djourou, Koscielny and Clichy in defence. A midfield of Cesc, Diaby and Wilshere, with Walcott,Van Persie and Nasri up top. The first couple of minutes saw us trying to get our passing going with mixed success. We were either passing the ball to the opposition or under passing leaving our players at risk of injury.

Liverpool had set up defensively with the view to counter, a tactic that everyone except Barca bring to the Emirates. They were trying to use Reina’s  massive kicking ability to get in behind our defense, but Djourou was not having a bar of it. He set his stall out early and Caroll was pretty ineffective whilst on the pitch. In the 6^th minute Suarez took a free kick but hit it straight at Szczesny. Arsenal continued to attempt to penetrate Liverpool’s defense but they were compact and aggressive, ensuring that the danger areas that we liked to exploit were negated.

In the 15^th minute Kosser had a header hit the bar with Reina in no man’s land. The 19^th minute saw great interplay between Cesc and Nasri which ended with a fantastic cross from Nasri which Reina did well to pluck out of the air before Walcott was waiting to pounce. A similar move in the 23^rd minute on the other side between Walcott and Cesc had the same result. Two minutes later the ball was in the back of the Liverpool net through a trademark Cesc/Van Persie combination, but Robin was correctly adjudged to be offside.

Suarez and Caroll were trying to combine but we kept them dysfunctional and ineffective. It was apparent to me how bereft of pace the Liverpool front line was and we were containing them comfortably. By this time we were dominating possession Robin chased the channel followed by Reina but was unable to keep the ball in play with the goalie way out of his goal. The final 10 minutes of the half saw us enjoy what must have been 70% possession but creating  no clear cut chances.

At half time, I felt it had gone exactly as I thought it would, except I had expected more of a threat from Caroll and Suarez. I was pleased with Diaby’s contribution, he was incisive and effective, no dawdling or pirouettes and early passes meeting their intended destination. Djourou and Kosser were in control. Eboue was causing real concern to Liverpool along with Walcott on the right hand side.

In the second half Liverpool looked to have a willingness to attack with more intent and continued to try to catch us on the break but not without neglecting solid defensive play. The 54^th minute saw Eboue’s achilles trodden on in one of their attacks and he went down like he had been shot leaving their left midfielder to advance.

We continued to probe without success and a clash between Carragher and his right back left him semi unconscious for what seemed ages, which didn’t help preserve our momentum. He left on a stretcher and luckily wasn’t seriously injured .  So here we were with two novice teenagers playing full backs and their main leader / communicator off on a stretcher replaced by the pony tailed one , bloodbath time you would presume….wrong in the 71^st minute Walcott and Wilshere were replaced by Bendtner and Arshavin.

Arshavin immediately injected that urgency that our attacks had started to lack, he ran at defenders, committing them attempting to disrupt their two banks of 4 with some success, but I thought our movement in reaction to this was poor and in some cases non existent. Robin rarely threatened the near post and Bendtner out wide right is a mystery to me. By the 80^th minute Diaby was beginning to revert to type, probably through tiredness and was correctly replaced by Song .

The crowd were beginning to show signs of nervousness and the Liverpool away support were getting louder than our 55,000 plus fans. The removal of Walcott was like a shot in the arm for the Liverpool defense. Gone was the worry of the ball over the top, gone was the worry of road runner coming at them at 900mph. In the 82^nd minute a good delivery from Clichy saw Robin glance a header goalwards, but no danger . Two minutes later Clichy to Cesc to Nasri to Robin again all one touch saw the gilt edge chance we had been waiting for, but Reina earned his corn and stood big.

We then broke again but Cesc made the wrong choice of pass, frustration/ nerves were beginning to kick in. Shortly after Suarez got in with a blindside run behind Clichy with no midfielder tracking him and rather than cut it back to two Liverpool players who surely would have tested the goalkeeper or even scored he blasted high, wide and handsome. We continued to press but my concern was the gaps Eboue was leaving behind and his poor recovery runs to get back, all of Liverpool’s attacks were exploiting that space. Because of the injury there were 8 minutes extra time signalled.

In the 96^th Cesc was brought down in the box after some cute footwork Penalty ! Van Persie despatched it coolly followed by a feeling of absolute relief/jubilation in the stadium 1-0. BUT it was at this point that we rubbed our little magic lamp and summoned St Self destruct. Straight from the restart Liverpool desperately tried to shoot. Szczesny parried and was closed down by Suarez forcing him to pick up. Suarez then turned his back on the goalie giving him the chance to take the ball to the opposite side of the box and use up some valuable time. Instead he kicked the ball to the half way line back to Liverpool whilst the defence were still pushing up.

Liverpool then went long with 3 players against our 4 defenders and Meireles running past the non reacting Bendtner. Song had two chances to clear, Kosser had a chance to clear both unconvincing, the ensuing scramble saw a free kick correctly awarded for a foul at the edge of the box. Suarez hit the wall with his effort and it ballooned to our right where Lucas was closely followed by Eboue running towards the corner flag with his back to goal. From where I sat 110 metres or so at the other end of the pitch, it looked like Eboue had put his hand on his back and then fell on top of him, stonewall penalty, to make it worse after protestations of innocence  Eboue had that ridiculous grin on his face. Kuyt despatched his penalty 1-1 ….the stadium began to empty almost immediately

Ratings

Szczesny – 7  Looked assured and was safe in his handling. Kicking still requires some work and he needs to add ‘game craft ‘ to his locker

Eboue -6 Did not have a bad game but made a very bad decision that cost us 2 points to do what he did was just typical of us this season. Still has the tendency to make injury seem worse than it is which annoys the hell out of me.

Djourou – 8:5 My man of the match I shudder to think what would have happened had he not recovered from injury today. Carroll knew he was in a game today

Kosser – 8 did not do much wrong but still has a tendency to try and win an unwinnable ball , but what a first season

Clichy -7 Energetic as usual and got forward well, but still worries me when he has time on the ball in our defensive third

Diaby – 8 pushed Djourou hard for MoM put in a very good shift today linking play quickly and efficiently, was subbed at the right time but should be pleased with today’s work

Wilshere – 7 not his best game as there were many stray passes today. But the sign of a class player is one who always wants the ball no matter how many mistakes he makes. Kept going until he was subbed

Cesc – 7.5  almost identical to Wilshere but was instrumental in winning our penalty

Nasri-7 not his best game and is beginning to look battle weary

Walcott- 7 was no where near as effective as I expected , especially playing against an 18 year old novice. Is not a winger

Van Persie – 8  battled all game usually against 4 defenders, had balls of steele to take our penalty at the 11^th hour

Arshavin – 7.5 Looked dangerous when he came on and tried to raise the tempo. Perhaps should have started bearing in mind his record against Liverpool

Bendtner -7 is not a wide player, does not look or play like one, so why do we insist on putting him there ?

Song -7.5 Solid return from injury

In closing, there is continual talk of buying this player or that player but  in my opinion no matter who we buy or who plays, when we continue to commit such fundamental errors of judgement life will always be more difficult than it needs to be. Mathematically the title is not absolutely dead as I still think there will be a twist or two, but whilst we remain unbeaten in the league this year we don’t appear to have the required momentum  to be champions…but I could be wrong

St Self Destruct strikes again !!

 Wonderman