It’s time for all true Arsenal supporters to stand up and be counted.

We need to take back our club and its traditions from the corrupt mind-control conspiracy that has taken it from us.

To that end we are inviting every Gooner to put on a white scarf and join us in a protest march before the home game against Aston Villa (route details below).

On arrival at The (Evil Corporate Brand Name) Stadium, we will nail our list of demands to the big black cannon by the front steps. Our demands are these:

• A club of Arsenal’s stature should have a wider range of pizza flavours available on match days. Where is our Hawaiian? Our Napoletano? Our Sloppy Giuseppe? With a bit more ambition we could have some world class pizza toppings at the ground.
• Our kit: much has been said and written about our shirt. But what about the shorts? Why oh why have we abandoned the classic, billowing, knee-length shorts once worn by legends like Cliff Bastin and Ted Drake? “Drake’s Drapes”, as they were known, offered protection all the way down to below the knee, reducing the risk of strains and muscle pulls. And their bagginess allowed players to keep cigarettes and matches (or an apple, depending on inclination) safely tucked away for use during quiet moments in the game. As part of the Arsenalisation of The *@:%!£*& Stadium – let’s bring back the big shorts.
• The Board of Directors of Arsenal FC needs to be more in touch with us, the ordinary fans. We need a representative at Board meetings, someone who is close to us, who shares our animal passion for Arsenal and who has followed the club for a long, long time. We refer, of course, to Gunnersaurus. He’s been supporting Arsenal for 65 million years so there’s nothing you can tell him about tradition. And if that new American owner cuts up rough at the meetings Gunnersaurus can always fire a T-shirt-in-a-plastic-tube at him from point blank range.
• Bring back the Highbury Atmosphere: it’s always difficult to recreate an atmosphere when moving to a new stadium, but we feel the club has been negligent in not helping to safeguard some of the treasured traditions of Highbury, not least the famous “Highbury Library Effect.” Although many like-minded supporters have done their best to maintain our strong tradition of strategic silences during games, it has come to our notice that some “Johnny-come-lately” fans have taken to singing and chanting during these precious moments. We would like to see more “Quiet Please” signs posted around the stadium, and for the stewards to use their powers to “shush” the noisemongers.
• The Manager: while we appreciate the great service our manager has put into the club blah blah blah, it has come to our notice that he is very tall and it is well known that tall managers do not win things. It is time for him to step aside and make way for a short arse, like Mr Phillip Brown or Mr Anthony Pulis. Even better, Gordon Strachan.

So come on Brothers and Sisters in Arsenal. Join us on this march and, together, let’s help bring back the Arsenal we love.

Yours in Arsenalhood, from the secret group of campaigners who call ourselves:

WHLOAMIFDTBOTS

(We Have Lost Our Arsenal Maybe It Fell Down The Back Of The Sofa)

Demonstration Route (Starts 12.45pm)

Assemble at the Chinese chippy in Avenell Road.

Process to that barber’s in Blackstock Road with all the old Arsenal pictures on the wall.

Round the back of the Gunners for a quick pee.

On to Higbury Fields to look at Clive Anderson’s house.

Up Holloway Road to the second-hand sci-fi bookshop to beat up some beardy nerds.

Cheeseburger from the third stall in Benwell Road.

Vomit it back up under the railway bridge.

Into the Armoury to buy a pair of Arsenal furry dice for the motor.

Re-assemble outside the stadium at the big cannon for nailing of demands, free ginger beer and a rousing round of negro spirituals.

Written  by Mr Arsenal

Arsenal’s fans have endured another disappointing conclusion to a long season- the defeat to Bolton firmly put to bed any dwindling hopes of silverware. The inevitability of the capitulation, however, has been the most painful part of the demise, prompting many fans to question Wenger and the direction in which the club is moving.

It’s difficult to overstate the enormous contribution Arsene Wenger has made to Arsenal. He’s revolutionised the club with his visionary managerial approach and is lauded by neutrals for his scintillating style of play.  But, another trophy-less campaign has led a great number of frustrated Arsenal fans to call this philosophy into question.  His emphasis on developing young talent is a big part of his managerial ideals but is also, to a certain extent, a consequence of the club’s financial constraints following the move to the Emirates in 2006.

Wenger has clearly built a technically gifted side that plays an attractive brand of football. But this approach can only take you so far and desperately needs some revision. It is time to spend some money on bringing more established players to the club rather than relying solely on the youth team in conjunction with cheap speculative signings. It’s a remarkable achievement that Arsenal has managed to qualify for the Champions League consistently since 2006, given the limited amount of money spent on player acquisitions compared to many of the club’s rivals. It’s even further testament to Wenger’s talents that he’s been able to compete for major honours in this period with the squad available.

I would suggest that a change of philosophy is required if Arsenal is to end its barren run without a trophy. Wenger needs to sacrifice his emphasis on technical quality for a greater degree of power, pace and experience. A look back to his early days at Arsenal should provide him with the perfect template for success. The double winning side of the ‘98 season boasted a great balance of strength/physicality (Viera, Petit, Keown), craft (Bergkamp), pace (Overmars, Anelka) and leadership (Adams, Wright).

Unfortunately, Arsenal has been overpowered in recent seasons and although Wenger has attempted to address this problem by bringing in players like Song, I think, we need 2 or 3 more physically imposing players to meet the demands of the more combative teams in the league. A centre-back, a full back and a central midfield player of stature would really benefit the squad in this respect. Gary Cahill is a popular name amongst many Arsenal supporters but I’m a big fan of Chris Samba at Blackburn and Cheik Tiote at Newcastle.

The other major problem is the lack of leadership at the club. Fabregas, in my view, is not a natural leader and seems to undermine the great faith Wenger has shown in him by criticising the manager publicly and evading questions about his future. Arsenal fans want their captain to be someone who appreciates the huge honour of leading out the side- and not someone who has one eye on a move to Barcelona in the summer. Jack Wilshere, a player whose great talent is matched by his dogged fight and desire to win, has my vote for a future Arsenal captain.

Even more noticeable has been Cesc’s poor form this season- it’s a common occurrence to see him give the ball away in key areas of the pitch and his lack of pace or strength means that he struggles to win it back again for the team. There’s no doubt he is an extremely gifted player with a classy eye for a pass but I think he’s been found missing in key games this season. If he wants to leave the club, then I would happily take 30-40m for the player and move on.

A greater threat upfront is also required for Arsenal to be a winning force once again. Arsene needs to learn from the successful strikers he has brought to the club in the past, namely Anelka and Henry. The team needs a front man with pace and an appetite to score goals. Someone who revels playing on the last man and can profit from the creative vision of Nasri and Van Persie. Arsenal’s lack of a cutting edge has been evident throughout the season, despite some promising form earlier on in the campaign from Chamakh, and Wenger really needs to address this issue in the summer.

There’s no doubt that Wenger has had his fair share of bad luck this season. The ongoing injury to Vermaelen, who looked to be the antidote to Arsenal’s defensive troubles and key moments in crucial matches (the Carling Cup final mix-up between Koscielny and Szczesny as well as Van Persie’s sending off against Barca) have clearly not gone our way. But these difficult moments cannot mask the much deeper problem at the club-the inability to win ‘ugly’, to be ruthless both in front of goal and at the back, to beat teams with both flair and gritty resistance. Wenger needs a greater degree of pragmatism- more physicality and experience in the squad would help engender a winning mentality – something clearly missing from this current Arsenal side. Many would say that it’s not in Wenger’s make-up to adopt this approach – but why not? He’s done it before, why can’t he do it again?

Yes, that’s right: a quiet beach a million miles away from the hurly burly of Premiership football and the unforgiving scrutiny of the media.

A blue sky, a blazing sun and a long, golden beach as empty as Abou Diaby’s head.

Obviously Arsene shouldn’t go there right now – that would be rude. He should at least wait until we’ve played our remaining games.

But when his team has kicked the final ball in yet another season of flattering to deceive, he should give the players, the board and the media a cheery wave and head off with a small suitcase containing only his Speedos and that bottle of sun cream that Phil Brown left behind in the away dressing room at The Grove last year.

And while I know his many critics will hope he never comes back, I beg to differ.

What our manager needs is some time to get his head straight and take stock. I mean REALLY take stock.

And to do that he needs to detach himself from the day-to-day craziness of his job. There are so many immediate demands on him that there is no possibility of him ever getting perspective on the big picture.

He is known to make decisions over every aspect of how Arsenal is run, from the colour of the loo roll in the London Colney toilets (white, with a cock-and-ball logo in blue as it happens) to the aroma of the massage cream in the club morgue treatment room.

Plus, we’re always reading how even on his ‘days off’ Arsene is to be found glued to a TV, watching some game in the Azerbaijani Third Division. Well that’s got to stop too.

He needs to go to his deserted beach for three whole weeks – with no Blackberry or mobile phone, without a lap top and with no access to television.

There have to be no calls from agents; none from journalists; no texts from Emmanuel Eboue with links to funny videos involving chickens. It needs to be total media silence.

Yes, he might miss out on a transfer opportunity or two while he’s incommunicado. So what? There is no point doing transfer business until he has fundamentally decided what he needs to do to turn Arsenal into a trophy-winning club again.

He also needs a complete break for his health and sanity. Personally I think the media have been over-egging the ‘man on the edge’ stuff lately because it fits the narrative they’ve chosen for Arsene (when Ferguson rants on the touchline it’s passion; when Wenger does it it’s a mental breakdown). But even so, the pressure and scrutiny must take its toll and he has looked frustrated at times.

I’m not going to speculate on what conclusions he might reach while his hammock sways from side to side with the calming monotony of Denilson’s passing range.

Oh alright, I’ll speculate a little: maybe it will involve re-thinking the youth policy; maybe he’ll decide he needs a proper defence coach; perhaps he’ll conclude that certain players need weeding out (and I mean weeding – not the full-on napalm attack that some of the more excitable web sites are demanding).

Other areas he might ponder are whether 4-3-3 is worth persevering with; whether to go all out for the domestic cups again or revert to using them as a training slope for the up-and-comers; and, perhaps most difficult of all, whether he has the heart to carry on.

I hope he does all this, because I firmly believe that he can make us great again. And when he does, I want to be there to watch the media lickspittles shovel humble pie down their gullets until they burst.

RockyLives

Written by Harry

All I ask of you in my hour of need, after the unexpected defeat at the hands of Bolton, as I sit here distraught and frustrated, even angry at the events of this season, I ask that you address the faithful the hordes of fans that support and follow this club of ours as soon as is practical…….

What do I want to hear?

1. Admit you have made mistakes.
2. Admit that you have been restricted in the transfer window since our move to the Emirates, but now you have the funds available to make the moves you truly want and if needed you will pay what it takes.
3. Admit that some players that you have supported vehemently have let you down.
4. Admit that we do have specific areas of concern that need fresh players in to improve us and take us up a level.
5. State categorically that you will address all of the above points, that we will keep all of our star players and have a real and proper title tilt next season………

Hands Up, My mistake……

In the aftermath of the defeat today which ends any lingering hopes that we had in winning the title this season, it is so hard to put into words the events of the match, and how I am feeling……..

The Blogosphere is awash with AMG’s, Fire Him, Sack Him, Walk now, Do the right thing, I understand the frustration and indeed I have anger inside, but I believe we are so close, to being what we all want that we must manage our expectations and get behind the boss and the team that he has built, as I stated above he has made some errors and needs to address certain areas……….

So today started with a real belief that we had an outside chance of still winning the title, some doom merchants will crawl out saying we never had a chance and it was all over before today, well mathematically there is still a 150/1 chance even now, but even the most optimistic fan knows, that the silver polish will not be needed this season……

The match started bright and the team seemed to start with the same vigour that they tackled the Spuds with, Walcott seemed pivotal to our day, but after the first few attacks, Bolton’s resolve not to lose seemed to take hold and they harried and fought, giving little space for our players to exploit…….

I don’t want to dwell on the match too much but will just give detail on the key moments@

On 38 Mins:  Bolton took the lead when Cahill lost his marker Alex Song as a corner come over, his header was cleared from the goal by Nasri, but straight to Sturridge who just nodded in from point blank…….1-0……..

On 45 Mins: Fabregas flashed a 30yard low drive against the left hand upright to see it deflect back away from danger……..

We had other moments in the first half, but failed to counter Bolton’s aggressive pressing game……Sturridge and Davies were proving to be a handful…..

On 46Mins: No sooner had we all sat down ready for the 2^nd half, Sturridge turned Djourou and pushed into the box from the left, Djourou was unlucky to see the Ref point to the spot as Sturridge fell over with no contact made…….

Kevin Davies stepped up and hit a poor penalty just to the right of centre, Szczesny held strong and saved well with his legs, the ball for once went to safety……..Game on? Well the players did seem to up their game……

On 48mins: Van Persie comes in from the left and touches the ball into Fabregas, who feeds back, Van Persie, curls a sweet shot into the bottom left  hand corner of the goal……1:1, game truly on?

Arsenal now really stepped up and created numerous chances that should have been converted, Nasri and Chamakh missing gilt edged chances……..

On 89 Mins: Another set piece sees Tamir Cohen nod in a glancing header at the near post……….2:1….Season over, 5 minutes of injury time, just prolongs the agony……

Ratings:

Szczesny: 7.5 …Saved a penalty and two other saves of real note, so did well but fumbled a few……..No chance for either goal….

Sagna: 7…I thought he did well defensively, but could do more in advanced positions……

Djourou: 5… Truly shocking, he is a liability at the moment, I have stuck up for JD many times and still have high hopes for him, but he is struggling at the moment……numerous mistakes, weak and poor positioning…….

Koscienly: 6…Steady but still learning to deal with the premiership, will develop, needs a bit more aggression for me…..

Clichy: 4…The root cause of our defensive fragility, harsh to blame one in all entirety, but I wanted him dropped weeks ago, he has no positional sense, slow in thought, restricts our play constantly and cannot cope with any pressure……..

Wilshere: 7…Jack tried and had some good moments, needs to be more selfish in front of goal, he has a great shot with minimal backlift needed, but never uses it…..Subbed first…

Fabregas: 7…Had a good game, but just not quite influential enough to get us a result, but at least he was having some shots, key role in the Van Persie goal……..

Song: 5…Has regressed alarmingly since about Christmas, but he has struggled with injuries, perhaps it has restricted hum?

Walcott: 7…Tried and looked good early doors, when the team was playing to his strengths, but as Bolton pressed, the team stopped trying to put Theo through…..

Van Persie: 8…A new record of 7 away games in a row with a goal, so well done to Robin, did well and dropped deeper when Chamakh came on and set up some good chances…..Didnt deserve to lose…..

Nasri: 7…Played well until when near the goal where his goal-den touch seems to have deserted him…

Subs:

Chamakh: 4….Poor, Poor. Looks lost of any belief…….

Arshavin: 6…Better, but still he is a wasted talent…….

Ramsey: Not enough time

Manager:

Wenger: 6: I thought he selected his best team (aside I would have dropped Clichy) for the start. But again his use and awareness of substitutions was lacking. I would agree some players have let him down today and through the season, but rightly so, arsene retains a responsibility to sort this out…..

Overall:

I do understand people’s thoughts on why they feel time has come for a change and not for one second do I see mediocrity as acceptable, I don’t think 3^rd or 2^nd can be truly seen as a successful achievement, So do I feel we have improved this season…?

Maybe, a little, but maybe we have a regressed in some areas..? But do I feel, Wenger for now is the one who I think should be allowed to continue to lead this team…..?

As long as  he heeds the advice at the beginning, by making the necessary changes, then yes, as disappointed as I am, he should continue with our full support………

.

A trip up to the north west beckons our weary team and our magnificent travelling support.

Some would say we’re a team traumatised by recent setbacks in the league: the loss of a two goal lead last time out, the late, late penalty equaliser against the ‘dippers last weekend and the pair of home nil-nils against Blackburn and Sunderland.

Suffice to say on paper the results don’t suggest a team brimming with confidence. Having said that it can be argued that save for the last thirty minutes of the NLD our attacking and midfield play showed genuine endeavour and self-assurance, even if the defensive frailties continued to persist.

It is fortunate that a feature of previous league campaigns is that most trips to the north west would be in the bleakest portion of the season where a trip to Lancashire would be about as welcome as a cold shower to start the day, however travelling to Bolton will, for the outstanding travelling Gooners, not be an arctic affair on this occasion.

Traditionally most Bolton games have been bruising encounters, who can forget the game where we had player after player stretchered off after the good old British values of “getting stuck in” got their due reward?

Of course this was in the halcyon days of Big Fat Walrus-face Sam, Jose Mourinho’s successor in waiting. It has been said that Owen Coyle has been attempting to get his team to use the grass on the pitch a bit more, rather than the air above it exclusively and in one way Bolton’s last game against a team with a manager that makes Allardyce look like Pep Guardiola, Stoke, showed they couldn’t compete with a “robust” approach as they crashed out of the FA Cup 5-0 to Pullis’ pugilists.

Form wise prior to the FA Cup semi Bolton beat West Ham convincingly at home (3-0) but lost away to Birmingham city (2-1) and before that a narrow loss at Old Toilet to ManUre 1-0.

The Bolton striker to look out for is Chav loan player Daniel Sturridge, who has scored six goals in eight appearances, and the reasoning for the loan is obvious when you look at the performance of Bolton’s other striking options: Elmander (one goal in thirteen) and Kevin “Elbows” Davies (one goal in eighteen).

Just to show that Davies has not changed his ways there is only one player in the Bolton squad with more than his seven yellow cards for the season, namely Paul Robinson, with nine yellows. This constant feature of Bolton’s play at least reassures us that even in a rapidly changing world some things just don’t change, and for that we must be thankful.

League wise, while Bolton sit in eighth place and we are third, they have scored twenty goals less than our sixty six yet have let in nine more than our thirty four so in theory an away win is a formality, right?

Turning to our beleaguered boys in red and white we have, barring the Verminator, pretty much our full complement of first choice players available, so in my opinion the match will hinge on whether the desire of the Trotters to bounce back after their drubbing at Wembley last weekend is greater than our wish to avenge the surrendering of two points to Stratford Spurs.

Not only must we enter the last quintet of fixtures fighting for a win to avoid our season fizzling out but it may well be vital we finish second to avoid the potential need to play a pre qualifier to the Champions League group stages should we stay third, as there are mutterings that that only the winners and runners up of the premier League will automatically go to the group stages.

Selection wise I have a dilemma for midfield as a few weeks ago Jack would have been an automatic pick; however Diaby’s last two performances have made Jack a less obvious pick. Having said that, Cesc must have Song with him if Diaby, less defensive in nature than Jack, is to play.

Up top is the question of whether Nasri should play left wing or Arshavin, with neither player being especially consistent recently. Right wing should be Theo’s place but hopefully with licence to play through the centre to give the Trotters something to think about.

In my opinion a free flowing, flexible formation playing at a high tempo is the best way to approach this Bolton team so for that reason, and reasons of sentiment, my team would be:

On a tenuously related matter, if any Gooners are looking for an IPL (Twenty20 cricket) team to follow can I suggest Kings XI Punjab as their owner is a passionate Gooner and he specifically ensured their jerseys were as close to Arsenal’s home strip as possible, they are even both sponsored by Em****es Airlines.

They also have another owner who is worth attention, Preity Zinta, but that’s just me doing my Cosmo Smallpiece impression.

A final point, listen out for the magnificent away support, they consistently do us proud time after time; always outnumbered, never outsung.

COYRRG !

Charybdis1966

This was going to be a very involved, well researched post about how many times we’ve clawed victory from the mouth of defeat this season or what happened to one nil to the Arsenal? But the sun is shining and although it was a lucid articulate article at 3am it still needs to much work and time is running out.

We used to be the team that clawed victory or a draw from the mouth of defeat but now we’ve become the team most likely to lose or draw in the final minutes of a tense game.  I used to be certain that we could hold onto a 1 goal advantage gained in the 80 something minute but these days it seems that the only certainty is that other teams know we might crumble if they apply the pressure.

Many have cried out for the ‘smash and grab’ that we used to see regularly, three goals up at half-time and then exhibition stuff for the second half. I actually like the roller coaster ride and coming back from being 1 or 2 goals down always feels very satisfying if a little scary. I always knew we would score ……….. not now though 😦

Although the season isn’t over, to see out the remaining games as if it is would be a waste of a season that has promised so much. There are five games to show that we have the fighting spirit, the mental strength and the players to snatch a few points from the remaining games.

As Arsène is fond of reminding us, we were written off at the start of the season and have spent the most part of it in second place!!!! Yes, we have underachieved, as the Carling Cup should definitely be shining bright in our trophy cabinet but maybe the disappointment of losing that final was just too much for this group of players.

Five games, fifteen points from these will let us finish four points ahead of last season and we can still mathematically win the league. The season isn’t over yet, I hope our boys aren’t already on the beach.

Have a nice day in the sun all.

Written by peachesgooner