Ok, it’s Rant Friday, and as usual when I pause to think for a moment beneath the happy veneer of my Arsenal World, I seethe. I’m vexed and the blood boils. I can keep the upper lip stiff no longer, and come Rant Friday, I crack.
So let me kick the day off.
East Standers. You make me sick. You’re an embarrassment to yourselves and The Club. The reason I’m picking on you lot is that I watch nearly all games on the telly and the camera points East, so tough luck.
Two games this season I did bother to rock up to were Palace and Southampton. You lot bugger off on 42 mins, then bugger off again on 85. You annoy me when I’m there, and you make me sick when I watch on telly.
What the hell is so ‘effing important that you have to leave so early. Please, just one of you come out and tell me. I know Holloway Road stays closed for an hour after the game, and there’s a short wait outside Arsenal Tube, but it’s a pleasant twelve minute stroll to Finsbury Park you fat bastards. What’s more, when you get there, you also have the choice of the faster Victoria Line. Jeepers.
And half time, what’s all that about. You can’t all have weak bladders, so I’m guessing it’s the delicious food and beer you’re after. Well, fill yourselves up with more fat and booze before the game why don’t you.
While I’m at it “Hey you skinhead over in Block 107, Row 2. Remember me from the Palace game, and the little chat we had”. No? Well, let me jog your memory. You looked a right tit leaving on 42 mins, and then rushing back to celebrate when we scored on 45. Then, you ‘effing tool, you did the same thing on 88 and guess what, we scored the winner on 90 and back you wobbled. Pathetic. What the ‘ucking hell is wrong with your sort?
Oh, and now my memory has been jogged, Southampton, and again I was in The East Stand. Cleared off is what many of you had done when Alexis pops up and scores the only goal on 90. You utter cretins had cleared off again. Unbelievable.
Anything any of you would like to get off your chest?