Arsenal Supporters, look to the Cookie … and other things I’ve learned – written by ArseChicago

Written by ArseChicago

Perhaps I’ve come to this realisation before, but the weekends with no football seem to shine an even brighter light on how large of a role supporting the Arsenal plays in my life.  Yes, watching the Arsenal, I realise, provides my weekend life with much needed structure (in addition to a perfect excuse to have a few morning pints in lieu of a 5K jog by the lake), as well as complete immunity from friend and family obligations for a handful of hours on any particular Saturday or Sunday.  Sad you say?  Yes, I agree.  But there’s a lot in the world to be mourned.  For example, my sad soul neighbour currently sitting by himself in his backyard as I type this, eating a bag of potato chips and listening to Chicago Cubs pre-game radio.  For those that don’t follow baseball, the Cubs would be relegated this season were it the Premiership.

But that’s all neither here nor there my friends, for I’ve got important and revelatory news to report.  News emanating from an exotic, mystic source.  Without the aforementioned immunity last weekend and with complete availability for spousal duties, a routine Friday evening dinner out at one of our favorite Chinese places yielded BBQ duck and this:

Now, I’m sure like me, many of you await with eager anticipation the opportunity to attach “in bed” to the end of the fortunes you receive.  And when I initially read the strip of paper from this fortune cookie, I immediately debated whether or not this was to mean that Arsenal, far and away the “sports team” nearest and dearest to my heart and leaving all others in its wake, would garner many notches on its collective bedpost this year or if it was to mean that Arsenal would in fact have great success on the pitch.  After some thought, I concluded that this message could only mean good things for the supporters of the club’s effort on the pitch.  Considering that Jack Wilshere is employing the ol’ camera up the skirt trick, which, according to my female friends, never seems to lead to good things, and given that Bendtner’s groin is on the fritz, how could I conclude otherwise than that this tasty cookie was telling me unconditionally that Arsenal was to challenge for, if not win, silverware this very season?

I know many of you have been up in arms all throughout the transfer window, wondering whether or not Arsenal had enough to overtake the likes of Chelsea and United.  Perhaps you’ve started to doubt the wisdom and frugality of Wenger and are looking for answers.  And while I can rehash myriad arguments in Arsenal’s defense, I suppose I’m sharing with you this fortune as a sort of last line of defense.  I have always watched our matches on the same screen at the pub.  Worn the same Arsenal boxers on each match day I bought at the Armory gift shop some years back.  Imbibed my morning coffee from the same Arsenal mug each match day morning.   And now it’s paid off.  My pleading with the cosmos has finally returned a verdict on our collective fate.  Arsenal will be successful this year.  Don’t believe me?  What if I told you I picked up 3 pennies off the ground yesterday?  C’mon, folks, it is as good as etched in stone.

76 Responses to Arsenal Supporters, look to the Cookie … and other things I’ve learned – written by ArseChicago

  1. Morning all

    A lovely positive post to get the weekend underway.Thanks ArseChicago.

    Come on Arsenal …… we’ve got footie tomorrow 🙂

  2. tommystout says:

    wonderful post chicago
    i hope your fortune cookie is the real deal.
    Myself?, i’m full of optimism this season, our defense is better, our strikers are better although injured 😦 , our midfielders are a years experience better and i’m confident that we will be in the mix right to the end this season.

  3. Red Arse says:

    You’ve sold me on the fortune cookie prediction AC, 🙂

    Can’t beat a good chinese to set the footie world to rights. 🙂

    Perhaps your neighbour should, at least, get a take home with some Won Ton soup, a little Char Sieu, sweet and sour chicken, shrimp in black bean sauce …. I’ve got to stop, I’m dribbling all over the keyboard! 😉

  4. Big Raddy says:

    AC. Fantastic post. What an entertaining read.

    With portents such as yours, success is guaranteed. And it is great to know that all the miles away there is someone else as obsessive about their matchday routines as I am ! From the lucky breakfast to the lucky clothing and the lucky beer. And of course the lucky cycle route through the park (the one that differs on CL nights due to the route being very unlucky away at Liverpool 4/08)

    RA. You are a true connoisseur of the take away. What wines would you recommend for such a feast?

  5. Morning Raddy – you have a soul mate in ArseChicago 😉

  6. SharkeySure says:

    Cheers ArseC.

    ‘complete immunity’ Same in my house as well, thankfully.

  7. charybdis1966 says:

    Morning all. Good to hear an upbeat post – says he of the moaning posts 🙂 – and it raises the point of pre match superstition I never really got.
    Being a chap brought up on analytical science I’ve never believed in any of the superstitious side of support or any aspect. I’d purposely walk under ladders just to be cussed in my defiance of superstition.

  8. Rasp says:

    Morning all,

    Great post AC. Some ‘experts’ have crystal balls, you’ve got a fortune cookie …. equally plausible. The greatest mystics of all are those who have the gift of hindsight before anything’s even happened 😛

    My tea leaves told me this morning that AA and Chamakh are going to score against Bolton.

  9. Morning chary – are you footballing tomorrow?

  10. Rasp says:

    Van der Vaart scores nil out of ten for originality. How pathetically obvious to try to endear himself to the totnum fans (who collectively must be creaking under the weight of the biggest ‘chip’ in history) than to proclaim how they’re going to finish above us this season.

  11. Hahahaha that must be one of the first statements a new spud has to make 😆

  12. Rasp says:

    Morning chary,

    I’m returning to my spiritual home tomorow and sitting in the heart of the North Bank.

    Do you think this works?

    We’re the North Bank
    We’re the North Bank
    We’re the North Bank Ash-bur-ton 😉

  13. Rasp says:

    Morning peaches,

    I wonder how impressed they are that their ‘loyal’ manager is touting himself for the England job in 2012. Old twitchy is that thick that he hasn’t realised that the FA won’t employ anyone with crooked credentials ala their last candidate Terry Venables

  14. If they’ve never sung it before they will tomorrow – are you clearing your throat already 🙂

  15. London says:

    Superb read AC, top drawer.

    Now will you go back to that restaurant and keep going back until you get a cookie that says your sports team is going to win the Champions League 😉

  16. charybdis1966 says:

    Hello Peachy, no I was going to go to either tomorrow’s game or West Brom, but I’m going to defer going till Eddy’s return after being let down by the club over the GK fiasco.

    Good Chant Raspers, I’m pretty sure it’ll be picked up asap.

  17. London says:

    Twitchy knows that they are not going to finish above us, so in anticipation of those ungrateful ingrates turning against him he is pretending to have alternatives already lined up……well that would be my guess anyway.

  18. Red Arse says:


    Not sure about the chant. The words seem a bit over complicated, but maybe that’s just me. :D:

  19. Red Arse says:

    Thing is London, it will be worse if the grateful ingrates turn against him! 😉

  20. Big Raddy says:

    How long before Gallas tells the press that Redknapp is a better coach than AW?

  21. London says:

    I think a statement like that from Gallas should just about sever all remaining ties and lingering affection.

  22. Rasp says:

    I’d like to see Wilshere start tomorrow. He was their best player in the latter half of last season. He’ll know how to exploit their weaknesses and they will be afraid of what he might do.

    I’m also wondering whether Cesc will start. He travelled to Argentina and by the sound of it was not at his best. He hasn’t looked himself for us either so far this season.

  23. I’m really looking forward to Cesc and Arshavin having good games tomorrow. For all his talk of losing his sparkle Arshavin scored for Russia and he must want to be an ‘Arsenal Darling’

  24. tommystout says:

    TV out tomorrow, squllaci in!

  25. London says:


  26. tommystout says:

    He’s injured, squillaci takes his place…

  27. tommystout says:

    yeah unbelievable int it

  28. Oh no – thats ridiculous 😦 ……… but at least we get to see what Sqidgy is all about unless Le Boss wants to give Djourou a go instead.

  29. tommystout says:

    lets see how they cope with Kevin Davies… babtism of fire for squilly…. glad we are at home!

  30. Rasp says:

    We must not play Djourou tomorrow – squidgy will be fine.

    Does anyone know how long TV is out for?

  31. ArseChicago says:

    Vermy’s out? Was that from the press conference? Ugh. I still have a great feeling about tomorrow, thinking the lads will be putting out a full effort. I wouldn’t mind seeing Gibbs get a start tomorrow, and will be curious to see who Arsene puts in Theo’s place on the right. Wilshere? Perhaps. I’d actually like to see Diaby put there. Peaches, as you just suggested, it’s the perfect time for Cesc to have a stellar match. Enjoy the weekend, friends.

  32. tommystout says:

    not heard how long yet, but i think wenger has confirmed squilly will take TV’s place

  33. tommystout says:

    he also said nasri will be in the squad

  34. London says:

    Did anyone see the highlights of the Blackburn reserve game?………Djourou was embarrassing.

  35. Rasp says:

    He’s had shaky moments in every game I’ve seen him play London. I wouldn’t be surprised to see him move on in the summer.

  36. Big Raddy says:

    Squishy will be fine tomorrow – his problems will be against pace.

    Tough decision will be midfield. Cesc has had to travel to Argentina and back, Diaby to Bosnia, etc etc.

    I expect Song Cesc Diaby and probably Eboue,

  37. Just heard on the news that someone has had surgery following an ankle injury picked up playing for England on Tuesday – missed whether it was Theo or spudwarf

  38. London says:


    He will be playing against spuds…..this will tell us pretty much all we need to know. I naturally wish him well, but he has moved back a long way in my estimation after watching the howlers he made against Blackburn.

  39. London says:

    I expect Cesc to start with the intention of getting us in front before making way for Rosicky or Wilshere.

  40. London says:

    “spudwarf” makes me laugh.

  41. gunnern5 says:

    What makes me laugh is when it’s acceptable to use informal nicknames for the opposition but not for anybody at Arsenal.

    No offense intended; just a casual observation on the code of conduct and standards.

  42. gunnern5 says:

    Arsene has stated that TV may be back for Wednesday’s game.

  43. Red Arse says:

    Not sure what you mean GN5?

    We have RVP, Verminator, Bendy, Squidgy, The waiter etc etc.

    Perhaps I misunderstand you. 🙂

  44. kelsey says:

    I must be ill, I agree again with London about Djorou.He is no way ready to start tomorrow,in fact he is way down the pecking order.

    By the way what is Djorou’s nickname ? 🙂

    Off to bowls, laters.

  45. charybdis1966 says:

    Kelsey, I’ve heard “Yo-yo” mentioned as one of the politer nick names.

  46. London says:


    There are only two possibilities as to who your comment was aimed at and one of them is me so I will answer.

    It goes something like this: We take the mick out of Tottenham and defend Arsenal. Simples.

  47. gunnern5 says:

    The sensitivities on here are beyond belief’ “La Scrouge” is an insult – even when used by an avid Arsenal supporter – but “spudwarf” is funny? and F**king is acceptable!!!

    Well I’ve got knitting me needles out again and I’m off to less sensitive knitting circles.

  48. London says:


    These are my own views, this is not my site as I have repeatedly tried to make clear which means I am not speaking on behalf of anyone else.

    Le Scrouge is an unjust insult on our great manager where as Spudwarf is fucking hilarious.

    You can take the boy out of the Council Estate but you can’t take the Council Estate out of the boy.

  49. gunnern5 says:

    london’ GET FUCKED!!!!

  50. London says:

    Now, that is funny and one of the reasons I blog.

    Consider yesterday G5, you wrote 5 comments without reply, today there is a debate, far more interesting wouldn’t you say?

    I’m not offended in the slightest, I welcome your input, I enjoy your passion and I still think Spudwarf is hilarious.

  51. gunnern5 says:

    London : You do offend me. I find your council estate comment to be totally distasteful and classless – and you have the gall to get upset at “La Scrouge”.

    But not to worry I’ve got my Voodoo doll of you and my knitting needles – so all will be well.

    This will be my last appearance on this blog because frankly I don’t want to have to deal with your type.

    I’d sooner have a job cleaning up horse shit than reading yours’!!!

  52. London says:

    I really don’t know what you mean, I grew up on a Council Estate and I am not embarrassed about it. I am also a football supporter and I occasionally swear, not so uncommon, hence the comment: you can take the boy out of the Council Estate but you can’t take the Council Estate out of the boy.

    I am trying to work out what has offended you because it is not clear.

  53. Red Arse says:

    Thing is GN5, I like reading your stuff, as do many others. 🙂

    I hope you reconsider and come back tomorrow.

    If you and London don’t hit it off, you can each talk to the rest of us instead! 🙂

  54. Children please 🙄 🙄 🙄

  55. London says:

    Just a bit of fun Peaches

  56. Red Arse says:


    How do you do those little troglydite faces? I love them. 🙂

    Oh, and London, GN5, I am a self important, self satisfied git and I don’t come from a council estate, so you can both be friends and gang up on me! No swearing tho’. 😉

  57. Mayank says:

    Haha, great post AChicago…
    Just what I needed to read after reading our less than enjoyable injury list.

  58. London says:

    Hi Mayank

    What’s your guess at Wenger’s team tomorrow or who would you like to see yourself?

  59. Big Raddy says:

    In my humble opinion, excluding racism, it is impossible to be too insulting towards a Spurs player.

    This is a football blog not the Court of Human Rights!!

  60. Red Arse says:

    Court of Human Rights, Big Raddy?

    The apparent abuse of a great principle of justice is guaranteed to make my blood boil. The rights of the baddies over the goodies seems to be its prime purpose. 😦

    But you are right, a witty put down, preferably of Mancs or Spuds is always good fun!

  61. London says:

    I think it is time for alcohol.

  62. Big Raddy says:

    Ii’s always time for alcohol London ……

  63. Here, here ………….

    RedArse – its a : roll : 🙄

  64. Rasp says:

    Evening all,

    I’ve been reading through the comments and decided that we may have to start issuing ASBLOs (anti-social blogging orders) 😛

  65. SharkeySure says:

    Diaby…wot a performance that was.

    I was stunned to find that he’d done so much before he’d even changed ends, as I was so wrappped up in how well he had played.

    He was like a cross between Vieira and Zidane !!

  66. Morning all

    Aaaaaaah football – I love Saturdays when there’s football.

    Sharkey – if you pop on, what game were you referring to when Diaby was so sensational. There was a game last season where he was gliding and skipping like a cross between Vieira and Henry – it was beautiful. Please Diaby, do that again ……. today if possible 😉

  67. kelsey says:

    I am really looking forward to the game today, firstly to see our new pairing in defence Kos and Sqi and if AA gets his finger out and Chamakh stays central,together with the fact that we are playing Coyle’s Bolton not fat Sam’s, I see nothing but a win by 2 clear goals.

  68. tommystout says:

    good morning peeps, wheres the post…?
    i hope i can rely on you guys today to get me a good stream!
    today has to be the coming of chamach attack attack attack – as i’ve mader him fantasy league captain for the day… a hatrick would be nice to get me off the bottom!

  69. London says:

    Way hey hey it’s a football day.

    Peaches, Sharkey was refering to the clip in BR’s 12:21

  70. Benwell says:

    Can’t wait, stuff the injuries we all know it’s a squad game these days.

    Will be in The Eaglett for pre match Guiness and hopefully catching the end of the Toffees beating Manure.

    Be interesting to see if the scouse wags do turn up with Bob Marley wigs singing “No woman no Kai” to Shrek.. brilliant!!!

  71. London says:

    Hi Benwell

    See you there mate.

  72. Football Cookie Gift…

    […] ective bedpost this year or if it was to mean that Arsenal would in fact have gr […]…

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